MUNDANE STUFF

Should I or shouldnt I?

2008-01-07T12:43:00.000+05:30

It is a tough call

I am considering to move Mundane Stuff lock stock and barrel to a new location

If anyone objects to this, please speak now or hold your peace forever(and of course continue reading)

Chicken soup for the dieter's soul

2008-01-05T00:33:00.000+05:30

Channel 1:

"Diet Now, Real People are losing real weight"

"Diets dont work, weight watchers does"

"Big Loser- brought to you by Jenny Craig"

Channel 2:

"Think Dip Think Arby"

"Bacon Sausages and cheese for breakfast"

"Eat all you can ribs for only $10"

Channel 3:

On a news channel for New Year

Donor gives money to congregation for every pound lost by the pastor. Lets hear how he did it.

Channel 4:

Buy XYZ cholestrol controller. Lipitor doesnt help. XYZ does.

Side effects can include nausea, weight gain, sore backs, blindness in the right eye, stomach pain. Some patients have gone into coma. Consult your doctor.

Channel 5:

Are you drowning in your credit. Call 865474286987693 to free yourself of this burden.

What is with this country called the United States of America?!

Apart from being convinced that the standard of average Indian advertising is way much better than America's, I have come to realise that people here are obssessed with losing weight and at the same time eating as much as they can.

Apart from the Gem and Tele shopping network,the couch potato is beseeched by the food companies- low fat, no fat, high fibre, no trans fat, chicken soup for the dieters soul and the cheesy dips comes free. Then the pharmaceutical companies take over and woo people to try their products starting from weight loss pills to bladder control.Finally the credit and insurance guys step in and kiss away whatever is left of the TV watchers soul.

So you eat all you can and gain weight, then lose all your credit worthiness by squandering on various weight loss and dieting techniques, and to save your loved ones you pay for insurance which will take care of your family once you die of obesity. That is one hell of a karmic cycle!

Every food menu heralds hope for the health conscious with a motherhood statement of "Healthy options available " only to serve grape fruit and apple along with cheese sticks.Breakfast/brunch buffet spreads can put a King's feast to shame.

Go to any ihop/breakfast place and I can assure you that the only reason why anyone is eating that cheesy omlette is because there is an omlette to finish apart from the 4 pancake platter!

If you havent had enough then dedicated TV channels showing extremely well maintained people working out only adds to the agony of the obese.Has anyone here stopped to wonder why do you need an all you can eat dessert counter in a breakfast buffet?

Wonder which channel plays the path breaking advertising which is always talked about. The last one I saw was in a McDonalds outlet playing on loop in a TV installed by Coke!

At the start of this vacation, I swore to myself I would soak in and watch as much TV as I possible could. Midway through the soujourn I have already switched off the TV and started blogging. I just pray fervently I dont become one of those them TV haters
by the time I leave.

Reading causes affliction

2007-12-11T14:18:00.000+05:30

Read her

and got the feeling that we are all suffering from the Ostrich Syndrome

* Ostrich Syndrome- ostrich-like approach of burying the head in the sand hoping that the storm will pass.

Juliet Morris at home in Gurgaon!

2007-12-07T23:25:00.000+05:30

My cook Nisha is a busy soul. She just cant find the time to do a favour for me. But finally today she wasnt her busy and hoitty toitty self and I managed to gather an audience with her for 15 mins for a good champpi(head massage).

Nisha is from Bangladesh and she cooks decently.As she parted my hair and poured warm oil on it, she asked me in her broken Hindi," Didi how many continents are there?" Of course she didnt sound as straight as that and it took me about two mins to decipher what she was asking me.I proceeded to name all the continents for her.

Thought the quiz was over when she proceeded to ask me which was the smallest of them all? About two questions on Iraq skidded and passed by. When she asked me a question on India I said," You are a Bangladeshi, why do you want to know about India?". Pat came the reply in a voice which sounded hurt," India is my country."

Finally I asked her if she was writing an exam of some sort, to which she replied, "These queries of mine have made me wiser for the day. When I go back home and teach my kids, I can tell them these points and they know something more than they currently do."

A good part of the last week I have been preparing for a real geography quiz of sorts. Think the champpi session made a week of my efforts worthwhile.

Realisation of the day:

2007-11-06T10:39:00.001+05:30

I am sure a lot of you are waiting to agree with this.

I am a Klutz...

klutz (klŭts)
n. Slang.
A clumsy person.
A stupid person; a dolt.

Random thoughts from the mind of a random number generator

2007-11-05T22:13:00.000+05:30

Random thoughts:

Heard over Radio:

If you have the alphabets in your name to form the word mint you stand to won prizes worth Lakhs from i-mint.

Thats easy! I have enough alphabets in my name to spell mint, ant,hash,lakhs,aim, halt, sham, list, last,lash, mash, hint, lint, knit,hit,aha(the expression)tail,shit!!

thought no.2:

Every scripture written was a code of living of sorts for the age in which it was written. The Ramayana Mahabharatha, Thirukkural Guru Granth Sahib. What have we written? Isnt it high time we wrote something to capture our ways for posterity.

thought no: 3

I am reading a travelogue in which this very interesting character travels along a route tracing the Himalayas. He meanders into China and meets a very interesting character who conducts operas. He recollects a scene from the opera in which the old man plays a soothing tune and asks the audience,"Was it peaceful?" to which the audience agrees. Pat came the reply from the performer to their nods-"Then why not play it in the Isreal-Palestine border." He was playing to a high profile audience which included American Diplomats. I sometimes wish I could say something like that to someone. Sad part is no one is listening.

But it almost heartening to know that the firing on the Isreal Palestine border affects this man in China as much as it affects me to hear about the emergency in Pak.

thought no: 4

I had a very interesting conversation with a young man from a premier business school. He was of the opinion that during campus recruitment, recruiters should not ask students their grades.

I say, students should not ask the compensation figures once they join an organization!

Thought no:5

The baseline expectation of people from life has risen. Makes it that much more difficult for me to cope.

Thought no: 6
Have you wondered why cities/areas which once flourished in trade/learning are in ruins/decline now?
Persia, Egypt, institutes of learning-Nalanda and many more.

Wonder what will happen to Mumbai, Delhi Pune soon.

Thought no:7

DLF is considering, taking in construction workers on their rolls, providing them good housing facilities and thus dissuade them from going back to their villages during the peak harvest season. Is that a good thing or a bad thing?

thought no:8

I look forward endlessly to the day before any festivity. The anticipation is palpable in the air and the actual day of the festival pales in comparison to the evening before. The preparations, the hope of enjoyment excites me to no end.

Happy Diwali ppl!

2007-09-26T13:22:00.000+05:30

I could learn a foreign tongue just to read these lines they way he wrote it:

Treacherous
generals:
see my dead house,
look at broken Spain :
from every house burning metal flows
instead of flowers,
from every socket of Spain
Spain emerges
and from every dead child a rifle with eyes,
and from every crime bullets are born
which will one day find
the bull's eye of your hearts.

And you'll ask: why doesn't his poetry
speak of dreams and leaves
and the great volcanoes of his native land?

Come and see the blood in the streets.
Come and see
The blood in the streets.
Come and see the blood
In the streets!

For all that has never been!

2007-08-20T22:54:00.000+05:30

Have you ever felt bad about all the melodies that have never been made?

Well I do. All the time.

A colleague at work introduced me to a band called the Traveling Wilburys. An absolute delight to listen to and I couldnt stop myself from playing their tracks over and over again.As I scanned the internet for more info about them and their music, I realised that they had come out with two albums(Vol 1 and Vol 3. Loved the madness).

I couldnt but help and feel low about all the wonderful music they might have made had they stuck around for a little while more(or may be if Roy Orbison had not died.) Its not bad enough I havent been able to attend a Simon and Garfunkel concert at Central Park,now I have to live with the fact that the Traveling Wilburys made just a handful of tracks.

Sometimes I feel, a lifetime isnt enough to really listen to all the songs we want to listen to, to read all the verses we have to.

Zap 'em all!

2007-08-19T22:02:00.000+05:30

Vidya and I hurried from the grocery store. We reached the main road.One look at the traffic and I remarked, " If I die, just tell people at work I am vacationing in Europe."

Thanks to the Lord in Heaven and the mercy of a Benz driver, I and Vidya reached the other side of the road to Landmark- our only window to culture in Gurgaon.We could hear people jamming and Vidya was furious the performance had started before time.We were there to watch parikrama perform.

Early? Was she kidding me? We were in gurgaon.The proximity we share with Delhi is no laughing matter and it is only natural Gurgaon apes Delhi in matters of punctuality. Phew, the band was just testing. Another 45 mins later when the band finally started, roomie and I glued ourselves to a comfortable spot -just in front of the speakers!

Just then a sweaty dude wormed his way ahead of us. In slow motion he began swaying his head. The strumming began. Then came the placing the left hands on the chords. Then he synced himself in unison with his friends who had already set the pace for this.Then they started coming.More of them.They trickled in from all directions and slowly they took over the place! Them and their air guitars!!!

I watched the kids in front of me with their dates slashing down their imaginary guitars and striking the virtual chords, jumping up and down, pouring their diet pepsi all over the place, mouthing " Give us some ****ing Metallica man", flashing their I love you signs. I half expected them to flash a lighter or maybe a cell phone. They missed that one out.

Vidya was plenty irritated seeing them. Why do they all have to be so wanna be she kept claiming through out the show. I just ignored them having seen plenty of them previously.I maybe even able to fish out a couple from my best friends bag! I preferred concerts of the more dreamy, poetic men with their guitars more than the metal guys.Which boy wants to be man who is a singer song writer kinds(Whoever wants to be, contact me- Right now!)

But as ever I went into my own stream of thoughts. So this was the moment. I have to do the unthinkable- I have to take a stand!

Do I like the air guitarists or not? Hmmmmmm....

Well let me begin with the thought- Can I ever be one? Oh gees. Hell No!

Just I strayed into my thoughts, the violinist came on stage. A 22 year old, he had an infectious smile. He started his melodious mischief. The virus spread. The guitarists smiled. The lead vocalist broke into a grin and soon the whole band was smiling enjoying their own performance. Well, this is the one thing I enjoy most in a concert. The musician enjoying his/her own style. Indulging themselves in every note of music. Syncing himself with everyone else. Now with so much to celebrate, how would it be if the crowd was composed of a 100 Me-s.A 100 me-s who just mechanically mouthed the lyrics of a Coldplay song. A 100 mes whose maximum amount of exhilaration was just shaking of the head, a scream at the end of the song.Horrible!

We need the air guitarists. The band needs them to pep them. We need them to entertain us. For us to laugh at them as they move about hysterically in their space.As they become a Vai in their own right!As they mouth every word with as much passion if not more than the performers.We need them to prance around trying to gaher as much attention as possible, try and steal a chance to perform with the band. After all I had been one while in school!

There I have said.I have taken a stand it!!!!!!!! Is that a tear I see in the corner of your eye?

Listen O ye All

2007-08-07T12:54:00.000+05:30

O YE LITTLE ONES…

Listen to the song of the Old ones,

Before thy step into the world of Human Resources…

Spent about a year being a human resource professional and these are what we have to put with.

Scene 1:

Enter cafeteria on Friday with the oh-so-happy it’s a Friday morning glee. As I stand in the line for breakfast, someone nearby yelps, “ yeppie its Friday morning.” . A new York minute wouldn’t have passed before I finished my acknowledging smile when the person retorted, “Oh HR also feels like that?”

"I bow in reverence to thee my master. We HRs donot enjoy the pleasures of enjoying a Friday morning. We are forever bound by the invisible rope of thy criticism- forever and ever. "I kiss and anoint his feet and bow out of the cafeteria.

Scene 2:

Three people in my team were on a holiday. Passerby stops and asks, “ Where are the rest?”

They are hiding in the Trojan Horse to eat you. “They are on holiday.”

“OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, HRs on holiday, smirk smirk.”

I immediately go down on all fours and beg for pardon. "Master punish them not. For my colleagues know not that they can take off”

Scene 3:

As I walk across the hall, “ Hey HR, why don’t you motivate us?”

Hmmmmm…. I click my fingers and Lo there are two Lebanese Belly dancers dancing for their masters.

Trust me, working on HR challenges is not half as challenging as walking the tight rope of working in an HR team in the organization.

A whiff from the past

2007-08-04T11:13:00.000+05:30

This morning as I opened my inbox, I was pleasantly surprised. Usually cluttered with group mails, mails proclaiming Delhi's events of the day, forwards, chain mails, spam there was a mail- addressed to me.

It read Dear Akila.......................

How endearing it is to receive a mail from a long lost friend.

Long lost not because I had not known his whereabouts, long lost because the bond between had withered.

The mail revealed a wedding in his family and he had invited me to the wedding. The sentimental nut that I am, my mind raced down to Coimbatore. To days which I think of with great fondness. Of friends who are like no other(Doesnt everyone say that about their friends!!!). I dont stay in those memories too long for fear of wanting to relive them. For fear of wanting to bring those beautiful people back to the way they were.

I thought about the wedding for about a few minutes. How will I manage my holidays? How would they be? Are they still the same?Will I feel bad if they werent.Should I go for the wedding or not?Never really liked wedding anyways.

Or should my fake "nothing has changed" attire and fly down for the wedding?

Then I adopted the strategy to solve most mysteries in my life-I shall procrastinate.

I have postponed the decision till just a few days before the wedding. Dont think I will ever be ready to face friends from the past. I want my keep me memories intact.Bank in the comfort of the glory days. Call me old fashioned, call me stubborn, call me foolish. Thats the way it is in my Kingdom- simple things are thought over, over anaylzed till I am paralyzed!

2007-06-22T23:05:00.000+05:30

She lay on her bed with her head turned towards the door.All around her there were beeping gizmos.
What would happen, if one of them stopped beeping she had often wondered.
Someone opened the door.
It was the nurse with the surgical mask on.She came in every few hours to check on her. Why does she have to wear a mask she asked herself for the third time in the day, though she knew the answer to her own question.
"No visitors allowed"- a board screamed outside her room. Too many visitors could bring barrage of infection along with them, her sister had informed her. But that didnt seem to affect the number of visitors who came in everyday. Some friends, lots of relatives.
Just another obligation to fulfill amidst their busy day of shopping, bridge and badminton, she thought to herself. There were very few people whose presence made her feel happy.
Her family was used to the sympathetic tone of most of her visitors.
They posed questions to which no one had answers to and some questions which everyone had answers to.
"Why did this have to happen to her?" "She must be under lot of pain."
What bothered her more than these questions was the tone. It was a tone which her daughter used to imitate really well in a moment of jest. It was high pitched tone which reeked of sympathy and yet was so impersonal.
There were times when she was accompanied by just her son or her daughter. She cherished those moments the most. In those days they had gotten to talk what was normally often shoved under the carpet. Her daughter who was reluctant to get married, her son who had just started shouldering responsibilites both at work and home opened up and spoke to her.
A group of visitors had just walked out of her room. She could hear them standing outside the room chattering about the date when they would visit the Kanchipuram saree showroom which was running a sale.
As she lay sedated in the night, there was feeling as though someone was waiting outside the door.
She watched the shadows of nurses who tended to the patients who were admitted in the rooms on the same corridor. Most of them had gone under the knife for a CABg- Cabbage as the doctors put it, bypass as the rest of them addressed it. She had seen two men being wheeled off to surgery on consecutive days. Both of them were now walking.The door moved slightly and she turned. It was her favourite night nurse. She had a smile on always which was comforting. The nurse asked her why she wasnt sleeping for which she could just manage to smile. If she had had the strength she might have replied, "I want to soak in as much as I can even if it just the scenes on this corridor."
She urged her to try and catch a few winks and assured her she would check on her in a little while.
The nurse closed the door silently behind her. This time heeding the nurses advice, she closed her eyes not long before she was disturbed.
This time, she saw the hospital attender standing next to her. She gave him a weak smile.
She opened her mouth mustering all her strength and said, " I knew it would be you- the harbinger of bad news".
He bent down and asked her," So you knew it was going to be me?"
His sandalwood namam( religious symbol which Krishna devotees wear on the forehead) had always caught her attention.
"So are you ready?"
"Well I dont think I ever will be but today has been a good day. My sister was around and so were my kids. We even had a meal together" ,she said pointing towards the room in which her son lay sleeping.
"But you are so unlike what I had imagined you to be. Shouldnt you be in your white robes or maybe black?"
"Ya, thats what movie directors make me out to be.I am just normal. Just another human being. Just that...."
"So what happens now? Do I rise up in a cloud of smoke while my body lies here? What happens to me after this?"
"Hmmmm... too many movies huh??! Nothing. You will have to endure some pain. Nothing more than the ones you already have", he said indicating towards her short crop of hair thanks to her chemo sessions.
"And?"
"And. It will all be over"
"And what happens after that? What about my kids? Will they be ok?"
"Nobody ever is okie in matters such as these . But this too shall pass- a little slowly but it will for sure"
"So you have conveniently not answered my first question"
He chuckled.
"It will all be okie right?"
"It will all be okie. Count on me"
Now she chuckled back.
He went out of the room, closing the door silently behind him.
She felt the pain rise in her stomach.

This morning as I opened the newspaper, I noticed an obituary column for a lady who was admitted two rooms away from my fathers hospital room. All the characters mentioned here are those whom I encountered in the hospital but the events are completely fictional.

2007-06-20T20:45:00.000+05:30

My brother solemnly rose up from his seat and announced if not to anybody but to himself

" adulthood sucks".

He had probably summarized what I have been feeling for the past many months.
Just before any of you go contemplating that we have been struck with some mishap/catastrophe, be assured that we are doing okie. We are what the world calls GROWING UP!

He stopped for a minute and said,"It was so much better running around in my nappies."
While I have been vocal,stubborn and difficult about accepting this new phase of life, my brother had slipped into it long back. As we took a drive in our car, running an errand for my father I blurted out, "I didnt have so many needs back in campus/school, when i used to manage with Rs. 3500 from home. Life's needs just seem to be pouring out from every hidden corner possible." My wise ass brother calmly replied" It will only get worse"- How comforting.

I feel like a lost tourist in a foreign country. Just to add to the drama, a lost tourist in a foreign country whose language I dont speak. If it werent spicy enopugh- the language has a different script.

Oh and Lonely planet doesnt make any guides for this- mind you!

So many roads, so many directions(which you cant decipher).

Isnt so much easier to be a smiling pic on the wall- Nothing to do but just sit pretty and smile!!!

No wonder they called it growing up pains!!!!!!!

In pursuit of my happyness

2007-05-02T22:35:00.000+05:30

For a long time I wandered around Gurgaon, with no address to call my own. I stayed in guest houses, hotels, kept travelling n an out of the city. So much so my mind was crying out loud to stay put and get a routine set for my life. Then came the news of my final posting, in Gurgaon(not to my surprise though!). Phew, now to get a house for myself I thought. Well, turned out that the brokers in Gurgaon had other plans for me.

I battled with artificially inflated prices for good apartments, 85% power back apts, apts with weird names like Bancourt, Sujan Vihar, Rail Vihar. Once that was over I reached the round where I had to cross the fire war of rogue like brokers who were nothing less than thugs. One particularly funny incident was when Vidya in some sense of courage undertook a journey
looking for a house in Rail Vihar with a broker who we had never heard of. Half way through her journey she realised her folly (and of the possible consequences- if you still dont understand what I am talking abt, visit Gurgaon, I will be more than happy to show you around!!!!)

And finally I found my house! In the same apartment complex that I had wanted.Though I had originally intended to write on my journey to getting this house,I am changing course now. I have been itching to write about the simple nothings I see everyday in my apartment complex every morning. The simple nothings that keep me going in a place where I have no one to call my own.

Everyday Vidya and I scurry to catch the office cab.I start from home at 8:05 AM an wait till 8:15 AM outside the complex gates.I do this sometimes intentionally so that I can soak in 10 mins of scenes which I so adore.School vans picking up school children,moms and dads waiting to drop them by,scores of DINKs pushing off to work and rake the moolah in, loads of single young smart women zipping past in their cars.

And the scene I love the most. Little girls in pigtails waiting for their kindergarten school bus. I just cant get enough of the way dads listen patiently to the young one rambling random nothings!

There is a fountain of water which is switched on every evening and loads of mommies bring their toddlers in prams to watch it. Sometimes when I walk past,after a long day at work a breeze of dry air sends sprays of water on my face much to my pleasure!

And the park- what a scene that is. Children on swings, picnics on grass,stupid games-all the works. I just stand by watching them. Sometimes I fondly remember my childood and most times I just take the simple pleasure of seing so many happy human beings.

So come over sometime, to this happy abode of mine and many others. Come be a part of my happiness...

Just do it

2007-04-14T10:58:00.000+05:30

While in college and neck deep into preparing for my MBA entrance exams, I and my brother had a discussion and he remarked- you always need to do the right thing.

At that point in time, I thought to myself that the statement my brother had made was just platitude. But today as I live my life on my own, I realise the gravity of that statement.

I try and use that statement as a yardstick for all actions that I undertake. In the process I have realised that it is not easy. The basic assumption for this is that you have been taught enough what right things are.

But as plain as it sounds it aint so easy to practise. At the peril of sounding like a moral science teacher, I state that it often takes courage to the do the right thing.

Courage to go against your own wishes and that of others. Life presents itself with so many situations, and to do the right things in all of the instances makes you live every moment of life with an intensity like you've never experienced!

Wishing myself well

2007-03-27T11:44:00.000+05:30

Last week I had received a gift from a friend. My roomie took one look at the gift and remarked I was probably not the only person who had got that for a gift!!

I said "just another week to go..." and a friend remarked-"So is this like your tactic to get more gifts?"

My brithday is around the corner.

In fact my birthday is tomorrow.

Every now and then I am faced with people who dont want me to make a din about my birthday!

I wonder why! Theres a mothers day theres a fathers day, the nation has a holiday on Gandhi's birthday.So what happens on my birthday? Nothing. Worse I am expected to keep mum about it?

This is one day which has me written all over it. Even if I have to share this day with lots of people across the world,have people who I dont like born on days ahead of and behind mine!!
I would like to be wished by friends and family.I want to be happy about the fact I have managed to live 24 years on this earth.I want to celebrate being myself.

My brother once forgot his birthday. How can someone forget his/her own birthday??!

Every birthday to me like a milestone. Milestone of me living my life. Milestones that I have crossed with the help of my family and friends.Its the end of one chapter and start of a new one in the book that I have chosen to write-my life.

Its a stop and check and go for me to renew myself every once in a while.

I cherish every phone call I get. I cherish every gift that I receive. I value the people who stay up till 12 just to wish me.I am happy when friends fret over the fact they will not get through to me at 12 as they are somehow sure that my phone would be busy.

It makes me that much happy to know that in this world there a few souls who love me for what I am.

So here to myself...Happy Birthday!!!!!

On this occasion i want to thank appa, amma, anna, renju, hari, vaish, sanjana ma'am, anu, sanga, maddy, sandy, siddhu, vinay, satish, goose man,arpit, payal,VK sir, suzie boy and the icing on my cake for being around at all times.

Just to get back to blogging lest I forget!

2007-03-25T09:18:00.000+05:30

Been quite out of touch so am just trying to get back into the "groove" of blogging.So here goes:

#########################################
Everybody is doing it. And they all love it. It is the biggest stress buster ever.Not everyone does it in full public view.

Some have a natural flair for it while for some its an acquired taste. Some do it in groups while some prefer one on one sessions.

Millions are doing it across the globe at this very minute and they are loving it by the minute.

Lets admit it. We all love to bitch!

Think about it-

We bitch while we travel in the cab in the morning.
We continue while we wash down breakfast in the morning.
We pick up where we stopped while the boss steps out of hearing vicinity.

We dont stop while gather for lunch or for tea.

We bitch while we go back in our cabs.

Once at home, we bitch to roomies. And to friends over phone. And to folks back home and not to forget over long distance calls to siblings.

We bitch about work. Now now. Thats too large a sphere.

We bitch about bosses. We bitch about super bosses. And their bosses. I have noticed in my case that at my level people are not privy to information abt the CEO. Hence we spare him. We leave that bitching to the super bosses.

We formulate strategies for the organization and wonder why the big bosses havent thought of it.

We bitch about colleagues- both within and outside our dept.

We bitch about systems, processes, out of turn promotions, people who get increments, merit increases, corrections.

We dont stop about the cafeteria food, the clothes people wear, the lecherous men.

At any given point in time I am privy to at least three intra office gossips and to atleast one inter office gossip.

While in college I whined endlessly about how much I hated my engg college classmates. In TISS me and a friend walked endlessly along the pathways just "talking" about classmates fieldwork guides and so on.

Go to a marriage and the relatives are endlessly bitching. Go to a party and the invitees have group bitching sessions.

All this bitching lead me to some introspection and I arrived at one logical conclusion- We hate each other!!!

###################################################################

If there has been an assault to anyone respecting me as individual it has been the show Coffee with Karan.

As a friend puts it -its more like Poison with Karan.

Wonder what was the logic behind this apart from some Dharma productions arm twisting.

Here is Karan Johar- A man whose movies I avoid with a vengence, whose taste in clothing is as pancy as himself.

Why would I want to watch a man like him talk to his friends- not just once but over and over again, ask questions to which we all know answers to or are not too bothered about.

After insulting the intelligent movie goer he is now hunting for the silver blood of the ones who avoid his movies and just want to sit back at home and watch some TV!

####################################################################

I was recently subject to an eve teasing incident. Its an invasion of privacy where some stranger walks up to you and speaks something what most people wouldnt talk within closed doors. What struck me was if two women had done what the two men did the other night, the men would have gladly said yes to it.

I have heard about Adam Teasing but I will ignore it because I dont see men committing suicide after they are teased.

Does He or does He not?!

2007-01-17T09:55:00.000+05:30

There has never been a point in history when somebody ever remembered my name in the first go!
Now that my name has been discussed enough in my previous posts, I will move on!
The point is, if a human being who meets about say 50 people in a day cant remember my name even the 5th time he sees me, how will God remember me?
He is probably running the human mould 24*7 and how the hell would he remember me, especially when I dont fall in the line of people who reach out to him in the many ways they do!
Isnt he the one who decided to put me in this menagerie??Its like taking a kid to the zoo and forgetting him/her back there!!So now dont blame me if I behave like the animals inside the cage!
Just feels like He has forgotten about my existence.
For a change instead of the pic I am putting my mood in words: Uncomfortably numb!

Talk the talk and walk the walk!

2007-01-13T13:29:00.000+05:30

I walk through the streets of an alien city
And as I walk my eyes rove to spot a familiar face
Who do I want to see? I know not
But do I really want to see anyone at all
I know not.
But what I do know is that I ran far far far away from madding crowd.
To a place I thought was unreachable for most
Only to find myself in yet another strange maddening crowd
A crowd that wants me to talk their talk and walk their walk!
But is there anyone who wants me to talk my talk and walk my walk?
Think my eyes are roving for people who want me to talk and walk the way I want to!

The above is not a poem...neither is it a write up. Its indecisive on what it wants to be and hence I empathise and leave it the way it is. This is based on the feeling that I have been having in the past few days. This feeling that engulfs me once in a while. Probably when am walking aimlessly in a mall or maybe just talking to friends...

help!

2007-01-13T12:54:00.000+05:30

Help
I need somebody...
Help
not just anybody
Help

You know i need someone....

help!!

-Beatles

I am sure all you matchmakers are going to go beserk thinking of a 100 ways to hook me up!!!

But save that trouble.

I need some help in revamping my blog. I think it needs that l'il bit of fresh air....

I was very impressed with the outlay of my friend priyadarshini's blog. She is the one with the big binary feet;)! http://binaryfootprints.blogspot.com/
I have a few ideas in my head. So anyone out there wants to help plz let me know.

And before you get fooled into thinking that the services will be paid for in cash or kind let me assure you, my love is all you will get and that my friend will be in truckloads!!!

Think about it. By helping me you are actually helping yourselves by reading my stuff in a better looking environment. and you know what? God helps those who help themselves!!!!!!!
(PS: No tongue in cheek comments on how I should help myself ...plz...get creative;))

Restless

2007-01-01T09:59:00.000+05:30

I begin my New Year restlessly.
My mind is working over time and nothing seems to stop it. I sift my music tracks with a worrying impatience.
Can I just run away from all thoughts and never have to face them at all.
I have been an escapist all my life. The one who has taken the safer route, not the easy one necessarily. But nevertheless.I hope my employers are not reading this but I am definitely the most indecisive person who has ever walked the earth. I cant decide on a restaurant. I cant decide on a dinner menu. I cant...
How I wish I could just shut my eyes and just escape my thoughts.Maybe transported to a land where I dont have to think of anything.
I just want to run away from reality now.

New Year Time!

2006-12-30T18:03:00.000+05:30

Its New Year Time...
Its that time of the year when everybody is racking their brains to do something on New years Eve and usher it in style. Not that ushering it in style is going to make any big difference to their lives. But still.
Think I lost the urge to usher New Year in style when I was in school. Then, my parents didnt let me out. Now I dont want to be let out. I was explaining this to a friend and he said " I can see the frustration buddy"
!!!!!!?????!
I really dont feel it anymore. It beats me as to why people start making plans about New Year a week in advance, most of them just to get pissed drunk(which they would get anyways). But asking people what they are upto for New year is always great conversation material. If someone even mentions about staying back home I act as though thats the worst sin to be committed(just so that I add to that social pressure, in case it were missing).

I prefer staying home on New years Eve. Not because I want to spend time with family(I speak to family about twice in the day, and if I am at home- I am already spending enough time with them- so much that they harbour thoughts of sending me off asap). I want to stay back because thats what I have done for a major part of my life and it has grown on me.

Earlier it used to be just me bro and dad watching TV. Then when Bro left home it was just me and dad.Bro would call up at 12 and wish us.

Now am sure dad is going to be off for some midnight special pooja. Mum is the only constant one. She will go to sleep at ten. So that leaves me. And I will continue with Dec 31st as just another day. Sleeping in the safe haven of my home.

The point that I love about New year is that you have the license to begin everything on a new note. New notes of resolution(in my mind-never documented for fear of being verified at the end of year)- I will manager money better. I will .... i will......
Just like a slate where you can wipe of all the crappy stuff you wrote the previous year and hope to write better things this year(and you know heart of heart that it going to turn crappy by the end of the year).
So heres wishing you all a very happy new year.... May your slates be clean and neat for the year!!!

pic taken from: http://images.google.co.in/imgres?imgurl=http://www.romanceeverafter.com/images/Little_Girl_Sleeping.jpg&imgrefurl=http://www.romanceeverafter.com/rosemary_halawa_-_photography.htm&h=251&w=171&sz=18&hl=en&start=17&tbnid=y60vdWrZX3nSeM:&tbnh=111&tbnw=76&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dgirl%2Bsleeping%26svnum%3D10%26hl%3Den%26lr%3D%26sa%3DN

Itz that time of the year

2006-12-07T17:01:00.000+05:30

Hurrah! It's that time of the year when the christmas decorations go up!!

The last few thoughts in Colombo

2006-12-07T15:49:00.000+05:30

As we walked into the Colombo airport, I was upto my old antics- acting cranky about leaving a place that I was getting used.

We were grossly late and my heart sank when I saw the long line outside the aiport. The UN Blue Corps(Sri Lankan guys) were getting inside.

It was truly a mixed bag of emotions. Some of them were clicking pictures. A newly wed was in tears as she bid farewell to her husband. Few others were making last minute phone calls-probably to folks back home who couldnt afford to be there to wish goodbye.

Wonder how it felt to be fighting for a country that was not your own. Wonder if they even knew the cause for which they were fighting for. Maybe it was just the hope that all their efforts would be repaid by someone else who will fight in a foreign land and protect their loved ones.

************************************************************************************

I got unto the flight and I was already high on sugar. To worsen things I was allotted the middle seat. To my right was Vidya and to my left was Anish. God save their souls I thought to myself. The flight purser watched in horror as I took more than my fair share of chocolates and loaded them in my purse for a rainy day!

Vidya was screaming to the air hostess to get me some food in the hope that I would just conk off to sleep!!!

But now unto something more serious.. I plugged in my ear phones and closed my eyes. I have this weird habit of listening to songs on repeat mode. I have been listening to just three songs continously throughout my entire trip.

As the first lines of the song began, I felt like I was elsewhere. I struggled a bit to identify what I was feeling. Then it struck me.

I spotted the place. I had heard the same song reptitively when I was sitting in the beach in Mt.Lavinia. I could feel it very clearly. I felt exactly the way I did when I was lying down as the sun went down (and for once I was not a spoil sport about getting my hair dirty with all the sand.)

Now all I need to do whenever I feel like going to Mt.Lavinia, is to listen to this song!! Love it.

Preethi's tag- Things that I love abt my childhood!

2006-12-03T19:23:00.000+05:30

I had been meaning to write this post in answer to a tag by Preethi.ON my drive back from Galle, I found myself naturally drifting into my memories of my childhood. What was that I loved the most about my childhood. When did my childhood start and end?

After thinking enough I came to the conclusion that childhood ended for me somewhere around the time my 10th std exams got over. The thoughts churned in my head and it felt wonderful to go through those lovely days.

Here are a few things that I love so much about my childhood. I found tears trickling down when I wrote about it. The feeling was too good for me to let go of it that I have decided not to write about things I hate about my child hood.

This post is dedicated to appa and amma who gave me a childhood which I cant find fault with. I wonder if I can ever give such beautiful times to my child. I for sure will be a painful mother!!!!

I loved the routine of my childhood.

I loved the fact that I had a routine. Not a day to day routine but a routine for many years. I didn’t have to bother about what I was going to do next. I just had to go to school year after year! I went to the same school for 14 years. Life didn’t changed drastically. I went to school with people who had been going to the same school for years. Unlike a lot of the novels there has never been a summer where things changed for good!

Queen of my world

I was the queen of my world. My parents treated me like I was the next best thing to have graced the world. My teachers were really fond of me. I had a decent set of friends. I was great at studies. I could rattle off the Vedas by just having listened to my brother say them. I had friends who were twice my age. Students in the 12th class knew me when I was in 4th std. I read Thomas Hardy from my brothers English books when I was in 4th std. I felt great about myself!!!!

Endless Clause Analysis

I loved my English classes and teachers. I was the pet of all my English teachers. I loved the routine of grammar. I loved clause analysis. I would do clause analysis of sentences in my physics and chemistry books. Clause Analysis is like dish washing. Have you ever washed dishes with a lot of soap? It gives you a sense of cleansing the world around you. While I did clause analysis I felt like that. I could break down every sentence you said, clean the mistakes in it and leave it the way it should be.

Mum

There is no doubt that I was the daddy’s girl. But I miss the bond I shared with my mum. My mum who knew all that happened in my life- my friends, my teachers, my lessons, my marks, my dresses. I miss that mum. Mum today is a very different person. I miss the routines with my mum.

After school routine:

I used to love that part of the day when I used to come back from school, sit on the kitchen slab, slurping some mango juice and recounting to amma what had happened right from the morning prayer to how someone broke my red lead pen to how much I loved her curd rice to evening national anthem. I don’t think anyone has appreciated every V.Good in my books than her. I think my mum was reliving a childhood that she had always wanted through me. Every victory that I scored- by means of marks or otherwise was hers.

First day of school:

I had this ritual that I went by car on the first day of every school year with amma. When I was a little kid she would drop me off till the class, find a good seat and wave bye from the window and leave.

Lunch by the tree:
My mum brought lunch for me till I learnt to eat on my own. I used to love sitting under the trees and eating her lunch. When I was growing up, everytime I fell sick and was recovering she would bring me lunch and a bar of chocolate. I miss these to no extent.

Yearly Family Holidays:

I loved the yearly holidays that we used to take as a family. We sometimes went with Bhajj uncles family. Bhajj uncle taught me how to eat with a fork and knife. Bhajj uncle always claimed right in the middle of our holidays that “ we are living beyond our means”.I didn’t realize the meaning of those words until long time.Our trips to athibelle, thekkady is etched forever in my mind and family holidays have never been so pleasurable as these. What I probably didn’t realize then was the fact that these were dads who were working hard for a living and working harder to keep their families happy. Loved those times.

Cycles:

I used to be taken by my brother in his cycle where I sat on the front bar(just like in the movies). He would either drop me till the bus stop or we went till the video store to rent a movie. I used to love this. I hadn’t seen any other brother do this. My brother urged my dad to buy me a cycle. He selected my hero ranger straight bar cycle for me. I loved those times when I just cycled aimlessly with my cycling friends in my summer holidays.

Dad

My dad was my hero when I was a child. He still is. He spoke the best English. He used words which I didn’t knew existed. Dad had the best manners. Dad took me to all the five stars hotels imagineable – even if were living beyond our means. He hugged me. Only he was allowed to sign my progress reports which shined with my O grades even though he would forget which std I was studying in. I loved dad. I hated people who hated dad. Everything that dad said and did was right. I loved his shiny bald head! I thought bald men are more intelligent because dad was bald and he built beautiful houses!! Now tell me how many dads can do that. I loved standing in front while he drove the scooter. I was super excited when I heard dad’s car horn.

At nights when I used to wake up and look around confused dad was there to tell me it wasn’t time yet to wake up. He would hug me, pull up my blanket and urge me to go back to sleep.

Now when I wake up in the middle of the night, there is a sense of desperation to hear someone say its okie to sleep a bit more. Its all okie.

I think I loved this the most- the security of my childhood.

Thoughts from SriLanka

2006-12-03T19:21:00.000+05:30

Thoughts from Sri Lanka:

I haven’t maintained a log of all my activities in Sri Lanka but these were some thoughts I wrote in my little notebook when I traveled everyday.

The thought that struck me the most in Sri Lanka is about identity.

I had never traveled outside India before this trip.

I always felt an identity is what you create for yourself. I have always had trouble with any other sort of Government identity(not everyone has a name with 31 letters in it)

But the word identity took a whole new dimension for me here in Sri Lanka. All Sri Lankans are expected to carry a national identity card here everyday. Without that they can be detained by the army, police, spl task force or anybody posing with guns and wearing a uniform.

I have always been interested in studying how order of society came into being. In that context I should have been a supporter of the “identity card” world.

But I sure hate the idea of identity cards. I hate being frisked. I hate the idea where a card defines me. But isn’t it a pity for a nation in having to identify its own people. Am sure there a sizeable chunk of people who have no form of Government identity back home. Yet they can roam the streets of their hometown and no son with a gun can stop him.

Civil War:

I am not a war supporter. Given a chance I would be an anti war supporter. But I also get irritated when peace talks get nowhere. But that is me. Confused.

The one war that no nation should fight is a civil war. But having to fight people of your own country(no matter what they claim to be) , to divide your own country, to having to differentiate among your own people is as bad as it can get.

********************************************************************************

Life in Colombo:

The streets of Colombo get deserted by around 7 PM. The city claims to have an active night life- clubs, pubs, casinos - Everyone parties in the safety of four walls.

But I think they are sick of partying indoors.

***********************************************************************************

The Sri Lankan:

There is something in the voice of a lot of Lankans that is beseeching. Beseeching someone to stop the war.

A driver who was ferrying us around the city spoke about how India should help Sri Lanka by monitoring the Indo Lanka maritime border. Alwis spoke of how the beaches in the North and East(the war torn part) is much better than the beach we were in. Nilanka took great pride in the fact that Sri Lanka had a variety of cultures- Sinhalese, Tamil, Muslims. Almost everyone talks about the lost opportunity in trade. Sri Lanka has great resources they say – gems for eg. Tourism is grossly underutilized.

But despite all this, Sri Lankans are true to their key chains and t shirts- SMILE LIKE A SRI LANKAN! And what a smile that is - genuine and filled with a simplicity that tugs at your heart…

Somebody do something and stop the Civil War

******************************************************************************

As I traveled to work everyday we passed through a lot of small towns. I could have easily been in Kerala for everything in Sri Lanka bears an uncanny similarity with Kerala. They serve dosai, Idyappam(called string hoppers) and pittu(puttu in mallu). The folks here have a dark complexion and endlessly long and curly hair. Women were dressed much like the Nair Sisters from Sabyasachi Mazumdar’s collection.

The market visit took us into numerous grocery stores. All of them reminded me of my mum’s native place. There was a smell in the air which brought back memories of my rare trips to her house in Kerala.

Feelingless in Galle

2006-12-03T19:09:00.000+05:30

Feelingless in Galle:

We spent our Saturday driving through the coastal road called Galle Road, for it lead to Galle. Everyone had told us about how scenic Galle was.

The drive was brilliant. It wasn’t just about driving along the coast. It was more to do with seeing Sri Lanka. We passed through numerous small towns- Moratuwa, lots of places ending with the word gama. We stopped at a place offering buffet sea food breakfasts. The world we realized is skewed towards non vegetarians and alcoholics. I and Vidya were happy that we had thulped breakfast before we started. We proceeded towards Hokkaduwa. We undertook a half hour boat ride where we viewed corals through the glass bottom of the boat.

I was amazed by the underwater life. I was more amazed by the way my life was shaping up. I was being sent to places which I wouldn’t visited on my own accord(for lack of funds). Right from Lucknow to Amritsar to Colombo.

Our next pit stop was a Dutch Fort in Galle. I would have normally stopped and read a bit about the history of the fort but the rains played spoil sport. We hurriedly posed for pics and scurried towards the van. We moved towards the beach at Unawattuna. We drove till the corner of the beach. It was now my turn to play spoil sport. I refused to wet my hair and just stood there waist deep in water while Anish and vidya ventured in. I also ran and took cover in the shacks whenever it began to rain. SPOILSPORT!!!

The jing bang consisted of I anish vidya, alwis from the office and his son rishwa. Of all of us I think Rishwa had the most fun. He was out there swimming, playing with his dad in the water, throwing stones and counting how many times it skimmed the water surface, eating ravenously off all our plates. He was soaking wet till his bones, he had a cold but he was loving it. I could also see that Anish was enjoying it. He just sat there having his beer in the rain, gorging on his chicken, smoking his cigarette.

At about three thirty we decided to head towards what was called the Lighthouse. As I entered the place I thought to myself “oh just another snobbish hotel” The Lighthouse belied all our expectations. I will post pics/ videos of the hotel rather than described for I would do no justice to the beauty of the place.

I sat on one of the numerous tables bordering the seaface. I watched the sea- the waves, how they broke against the rocks and washed ashore. I knew I was being engulfed by a calm which I couldn’t take on my own. I plugged my ipod and listen to some songs repetitively. What is it about the sea that soothes us?

To me it is the continue routine of the seeing the waves. I cant differentiate one from the other. But I take comfort in the thought that when one dies there will be another similar one. Friends who know me well know that I hate changes. Though I adapt well to changes, I am as bad as it can get at the face of change.
As I sat there I felt an emotion to which I struggle to put a name even now. So I took the reverse route. I listed in my mind some emotions I have experienced and tried to do a checkmark against each of them

Was I happy?

Well I wasn’t sad.

Was I melancholic?

Yes, definitely but that didn’t completely explain the way I felt. Melancholy was more an outcome of the way I was feeling.

Was I missing someone?

Hmmm…. Technically shouldn’t I be saying that I was missing family and friends. No I wasn’t missing anyone. Think that is what living alone does to you. I did wish appa saw this building. He would have loved the architecture. After all its not everyday you get to sit in a place from where you can descend a flight of stairs and reach the sea!!!

Strangely I also did not want to share this moment with anyone. Anish wanted to be there on a date with someone. I wouldn’t mind a date but am okie like this I thought to myself!

Back to what I felt.

Did I feel a bit betrayed?

Yes. I could trace a bit of betrayal- of lost friendships.

It was getting a bit tiresome. I really couldn’t find that one word that would explain state of mind and out me at ease. I sat there clutching my legs and watching the sea.
I have strange habit of praying to seas and mountains. I truly believe there is someone listening!

So I tried praying and pray I did.

No I didn’t realize why I felt like that. But I prayed for something that I wanted to feel about.

If I wrote about that too, then there wouldn’t be much left to imagination.

2006-11-30T17:24:00.000+05:30

mood for the day:

Sometimes whenyou are not aroundpeople you want to be and everyone seems to be waiting to misconstrue what you are saying, music is the best companion. Havent left my ipod for a minute for the past couple of days! Never had more fun being by myself!

2006-11-29T17:42:00.000+05:30

Ayubowan ppl.... Thatz me with Anish in Colombo. Flicked it from Anish's orkut Album.

Mood for the day:

Think...rather know that the original(featuring me !) looks better..will post that from India!!

Song in head :

Dum tara dum tara mast mast....dum tara dum tara jhashn jhashn!

Have fallen in love completely with Srilanka- the beaches, the people(The men esp;))! the accent, the warmth, the hospitality. Have been talking in typical sing song manner for a while now much to a lot of people's annoy!

Have loads of thoughts. Will compile them when I get back home. Tired myself out completely by posing for pictures.

My phone hasnt rung in a while now. Shows how much people back home(except for appa and amma) miss me!!!

Ceylon!

2006-11-25T19:03:00.000+05:30

Thoughts from Ceylon:

While shopping at Odel-the mini version of our malls

I walked into a section having natural soaps. My eyes fell on this package which was called the Desperate Housewives special. I asked the lady at the counter what the package contained. When I noticed there was nothing much different in it, I asked her then why it was called

the Desperate housewives collection. " It is good for housewives Madam".

Display pic for the day:

tell me what you think

2006-11-23T17:07:00.000+05:30

Thought I will start this new format on my blog. Am not sure if there are other similar blogs/ people using this form of expression(Am sure there are!!)

I shall post a photo a day.I may use my own pics or I might google for it. This image will be a reflection of my mood for that day. I may or may not explain why I feel so. Feel free to interpret and leave your comments.

There is Hope!

2006-11-21T15:13:00.000+05:30

As I waited for my turn in the lunch queue, I got a call from a Mumbai number.

I smiled.

" Akila, Its me"

"Yes Sir"

" You are okie?"

"Yes sir"

" What happened after I called last night?"

" Cant tell you right now sir, but am okie"

"if you are not just tell me, I will fly down"

A few hours later, I met this mad woman called arpita joshi online.

As we ended our conversation, which was filled with my cribbings, she bade me farewell.

"Tell my Hi to the ocean" , she said.

Those words of hers brought back memories of our mad times at TISS. Hour long discussions on music, books, people, arguments, movies, my disgusting alarm clock, her weird sleeping postures, our common lifeline-Payal.

I leaned back and told myself "RELAX, there is still some goodness left in the world"

Worried!

2006-11-21T10:24:00.000+05:30

I have not been at peace for the past couple of days.

I have been in a mood to whine.

I worry that there isnt much kindness left in people. So much so we might run out of it completely one day. Friends say I am the eternal pessimist-not without enough reason.

Some say I am over reacting. I think am just worried.

I am just worried, that I see so much insensitivity, rudeness and loathing everyday that I might forget to count my blessings and be happy.

Some stare at me quizzically, as though I am on the look out for something Utopian when all I am asking for is just a tad bit of extra kindness in all of us.

2006-11-13T15:39:00.000+05:30

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

I love thee to the depth and breadth and height

My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight

For the ends of being and ideal grace.

I love thee to the level of every day's

Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.

I love thee freely, as men strive for right.

I love thee purely, as they turn from praise. I love thee with the passion put to use

In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.

I love thee with a love I seemed to lose

With my lost saints. I love thee with the breath,

Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose,

I shall but love thee better after death.

-- Elizabeth Barrett Browning

I sometimes wonder if it is ever possible to love any as much. To love someone as much would be love yourself lesser or maybe not.

Do they even make people who love as much and who can be loved as much anymore?

2006-11-04T13:50:00.000+05:30

Have you ever been to a wedding which is as beautiful as the bride and the groom? Well I have.

I am personally not a big fan of weddings. I often wonder why we manage to complicate things so much. A houseful of relatives and a hall full of strangers isn’t surely my idea of fun. Before I left for the wedding, I found myself confessing to a friend regarding the same and he termed it” cognitive dissonance” as to why I was attending the wedding, in spite of loathing the whole of routine. I just had one reason- “Because, I love her and him.”

It was my friend Anu’s wedding. The words Anu’s wedding seem to have been around forever. We spoke about while in college, after we left college and didn’t stop talking about when we started working. Someone enquired to me “ Oh Anu’s wedding? With that guy whom she has been going with forever”. Ya sounds long doesn’t it.

Anu and Jaikantan met while they were at work and Jai asked her out for a cuppa on Nov 3rd 2002. Nov 3rd 2006 I found myself attending their wedding!!

When I and Anu spoke over the phone, I had this feeling around me as though nothing had changed about us and probably never will. We still had our hour long bitching sessions over phone. We cribbed about life and felt happy at the end of the conversation.

Anu’s wedding reiterated those feelings. Nothing had changed. I arrived first among her TISS friends and she was there to pick me up at the airport with her mehendi on! Just like a zillion times I and sangha were there at the airport in Mumbai and shouting Anu macchannnnnnnnnn and totally embarrassing her.

I was there in Chennai when she bought her wedding saree and went shopping for her jewels. Just like a zillion times we had gone shopping in Mumbai. Just that she picked up one of the most beautiful sarees for her wedding this time!

We got dressed for the engagement party and as usual I hung around and admired her and gave her my two pence when she asked me about how she looked. What can you tell someone who looks gorgeous? I just said ” gorgeous”!

As she wore here anklets, I felt no different from the umpteen times I hung around her room as she dressed for her dance performances in TISS!

She drove herself to her engagement! What a woman!

At the party, a lot of TISS friends trooped in. The screams and the hugs the nods the oh so business like how are you to some. Nothing had changed.

The marriage hall was not the typical claustrophobic tam brahm halls. It was quite breezy with a lot of sunshine and Anu looked ravishing.

And…and… Jaikantan our man! How could I forget him.

Jaikantan is the sort of person who will make you feel comfortable even if you are meeting him for the first time. He will make you feel as though you have known him for ages. And he is the kinds who you have to, have to hug everytime you meet. He is like any typical man who watches cricket while making conversation, but unlike lot of others he can charm his way through anybody’s heart!

Just before the swing ceremony started, the groom and the bride play with the garlands and I sang in my head “ Malai mathinal, kodhai malai mathinal”. This song never fails to choke me up everytime I hear it.

The thali was tied(which none of us could see as all the family members had surrounded them). Afterwards, I maddy and sangha sat there and discussed arbit stuff, just like in one of yet another night out sessions. One of us remarked” So there goes one from the gang of four making it gang of three”, another immediately retorted, “or there grows our gang from a gang of four to a gang of five”. Then there was VK sir from TISS, with whom discussions continued. Just as though we had left it after class and we just seamlessly picked it up at Anu’s wedding.

We clicked a millions snaps with the bride and the groom and clicked a few with ourselves. Just like we did that- from meghmudra to our stress buster parties to our night outs to our graduations and now the weddings.

As we parted ways, we made our plans to meet for Asweni’s wedding at Chennai. Just like our plans to go to Goa, our plans to eat out in a fancy place.

As I parted with Sangha at the airport, and kissed her good bye I felt less panicky. I thanked my stars for meeting the few good men and women in my life who don’t change.

Thanks Anu, Sangha, Maddy, VK sir, and now Jai!!!!!!

And herez wishing Anu and Jai many more Nov 3rds together!

Can I?

2006-10-27T16:01:00.000+05:30

Can I be a poem??
Can I feel like one?
One that sounds beautiful?
Can I write one??
Can I just bask in sun on a cold yet warm day, waiting for winters onset and just be happy?
Can I just read all I want to read?
Can I just be the music I love to hear?
Can I make a movie that I would love?
Can I just jump out of my skin and watch me live for a day and still be not me?
Can I just be known as me?
Can I not ever be associated with just one state of mind or being?
Can I ask for more with life?
Do I want an encore with my past?
Can I ask time to go a little slow on me?
Cant I just dream and not fear about it?

Can I dream of abolishing distance?
Can I just smile and not have a reason for it?
Can I learn every language that is beautiful?
Can I just be simple and uncomplicated?
Can I avoid pretentiousness around me?
Can I welcome a monday as much as I relish a saturday?
Can I use the word freedom and still feel it?
Can I just find a fireplace to warm my slippers?
And some hot chocolate and french fries!
Can I never ever worry about money?
I often dream of a currency less world...
Can I dance?
Can I just feel the goodness around me?
Can I feel protected by my beliefs?
Can I just hang on to a few precious moments for just a while longer?
Can I have an opinion?
Can I just be me?

Manni Vanthacha?

2006-09-22T16:54:00.000+05:30

This one is dedicated to My brother and sis in law:

Did you know that the whole of Tam Brahm family and friends I have are officially mad??

My brother s wedding just got over.

I tied the thaali( second and third knot).

Dont think the girls relatives trusted me enough. I was shown the saree I would get if i tied the knot properly!

and one maami( not a bully one though) Konthai, it is two knots. One and then two!

I was literally shivering when I tied the knots. Told my brother " strong knots there buddy- what do i get ?"

only to realise he was not hearing me!!

Anyways, I got down from the stage and started searching for the slippers I had lost when one bully maami pulled me and said " Manni Vantha cha?"(has you sis in law come?)

I was just short of saying" one - leave my hands you bully and two- didnt you see her coming since the last few days?"

Instead I just smiled and said" oh ya and gave her my famous mile-long-smile"

I continued searching for my slippers when one mama came and said " manni vanthacha?"

I thought, "oh he must be related to that bully maami"

As I was walking towards the dining hall, a group of my relatives called out " Manni vanthacha?"

You crazy people, what were you doing so long? sleeping while my brother tied the thaali?

I was running behind my kid cousin when one maami called out so that the whole of coimbatore could hear" Akila, manni vanthacha? Next you!!!"

Okie! maami, thanks for granting me that permission!

I was attending a phone call when BULLY MAAMI ASSOCIATION president walked up to me and said" yenna Akila, manni vanthacha"

me: "No maami. She kind of missed her flight. She is stuck in Arizona. So my brother just tied a thali to one girl we found who matched her facial features"

Maami" so , when is yours?"

Me: Oh, he is on the way maami.

I scooted off leaving her to think about it. I realised the implication of that statement when that Bully maami walked upto my mom and said, "what Jaya , you never told me Akila is engaged. I was thinking of suggesting her name for my cousin's daughter's sister in law's adopted son who is now in LA"

I found my already harried mum screaming for my name in the next two minutes!

After many more manni vanthacha s and next you only statements, I found my slippers!

What it takes to be Ananthalakshmi Hariharasubramoni

2006-09-22T16:27:00.000+05:30

Scene 1: I enter the office premises.
Swank corporate office, receptionists with looks that can kill, smartly dressed executives, flowers and all the works of an MNC.
I enter the office, with my files, listening to my nano.
Suddenly the receptionist shouts" What?? Ananthalakshmi Hairihara what?? "
And I turn and look around to see who takes the pain of calling out my full name. I am even flattered someone has even managed to cross my first name.
I run to the reception desk only to see a courier guy with a courier for me.

It's ananthalakshmi I proclaim to a bunch of people who care a damn. Suddenly the receptionist perks up with a smile and says , "what is is your surname?"
Me: I dont have a surname.
R: but you said something. Some hari hara.
Me: Forget it, give me the courier and let me go bury my head in a pile of sand.

Scene 2: Person at the next cubicle wants to borrow a pen. She hasnt spoken to me since the time I have come. She walks up gingerly and says " What is your name? "
Me: Ananthalakshmi.
she: OH! what a long name. Can I borrow your pen?
Me: No. Not in a 100 years
Scene 3: The hot receptionist calls out "eh Lakshmi..Eh Lakshmi...You Anantha laxmi"
me:" Oh me? My name is ANANTHALAKSHMI.
she: yaya...whatever. Tell me your name, I want to list it in the sheet containing the extension numbers.
Me: I am Ananthalakshmi.She: Surname?
Me: Just a H
She: But you said something .Some hari hara.
Me: No. That was my evil doppleganger roommate. I am just Ananthalakshmi.H.
she: Do you want me to add it?
Me: Ya maybe if you give everyone two phones in the office. One showing my first name and my surname following in the screen of the second phone.

I am ecstatic that I am atleast getting listed on the extn no. list.
I call up Vidya a co intern to tell her about this exciting bit of news.

Vidya: Arrey But your name is coming as anatha laksmi
Me: Damn that hot-now-turned-dumb girl

I call her up and spell out my name and ask her to correct it.
I call up Vidya again and ask her to check if the spelling is right.

Vidya: Now it is Ananth Lakshimi.
I take out a paper and write my name in bold letters with a permamnent marker, huge enough for person from opp. block to read and shove it to the receptionist.

R: So is there a space between Anantha and Lakshmi?
Me: no
Call up vidya back
Vidya: hahahahahahaha...
Me: What?
Vidya: Now it is Anantha Lakshmi!
I give up. Atleast my name is right.

Scene 4: Lunch with senior employees and top management.

This really hot guy walks up and starts talking to me. I cross the stage where I have told him my name and he has managed to catch it after a zillion times when suddenly someone calls out for Akila and I turn.

He is confused. I explain Akila is meant for all the people who are incompetent to pronounce my actual name. Just then I cross into the threshold where my name becomes the after dinner joke.

A Friend turned foe: So you do know ther her surname is Hariharasubramoni right?
me: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have just an initial. H!

FTF: hahahaha and have you seen her visiting card??! hahahaha. She has two cards- one for her name and the other carrying all contact details.
By now I am already half drowning in a 7 feet pool of water.

Damn! there goes another one.
Afternoon passes by, evening comes and many such after dinner jokes on my name, I meet the cute guy in the office hallway!

I am sure he wont remember me or my mile long name, when he walks up and says, " Lakshmi right?"

yes, yes a thousand times over!

Lakshmi, Laxmi, Lakshimi, kuppa, suppa, muppa, anything for you!

BULLY MAAMIS

2006-08-28T01:24:00.001+05:30

My brother's wedding is finally here.

The house is bursting in its seams with guests. Actually, I am just hyping it all up. It still hasnt but it sure will soon.

But a wedding can be tough. Not just on the bride and the groom but for everyone. With all the dynamics one has to manage, you either need to be a master juggler or just plain pretentious.

How else can you manage a bus load of people- each one opinionated about everything and anything?
I came home just yesterday and have been meeting a lot of relatives. As I move from one to another I mapped out an imaginary questionnaire that I was filling out for everyone.

Akila's exhaustive list of TAM BRAHM BULLY MAAMI'S LIST OF CONVERSATION TOPICS.

The following is a check list of questions which will be asked when a cart load of specimens called tam brahm mami's meet me.

Lets start out with the ladies. The ladies/mami's/aunts have to, I mean really have to, start out a conversation( even without saying a hello, how are you?) with a remark about my looks.

The minute you meet an aunt/female relative, the first words that invariably falls out of her mouth will be," Oh you have changed?"

While one aunt was talking about how dark I had become, the other one took it upon herself to review my nose piercing. Innumerable correlations were made in the mind about nose studs and fashion.

The next most comment you are bound to hear is, "Oh God, you are not wearing any jewels?"

People who know me well know that I hate wearing chains/bangles/bracelets of any sort.
In the past two days the only time my mum spoke to me was when she called me aside and thrusted a chain into my hands and said, " For God's sake wear this. "

Until a few years back when I was wearing a bindi regularly, my dad's friend paddu uncle's aim in life was to tell me how to wear my bindi properly.

Well, I wear a bindi in its minimal form- just a dot or a line. But even that was a point of contention for Paddu mama. He wanted me to wear it at the point just above the point where my brows joined- just at the exact point where it looked hideous on me.

Till date he squints his eye to find out where my bindi is.

Then the mother of all topics- my height.

Okie I am short. so what?
Okie I am way below the average height a normal person should be. So what?

My mum's elder sister walked in and looked at me and said " Oh you should grow taller"
What a grand opening to my day. I am 23 years old. According to science, after you cross 20, you usually dont grow taller. So here I am all of 23 years, when my aunts feels I should grow taller. Why not?

I looked at my mum crossly and said ," Can you please tell people I cant grow taller than this anymore?"

Discussing my height is like a pet topic for a lot of people. I take after my dad who is short. His who family is always gushing about how short my grandmom was and how short my dad and I are.

While people are on the height topic, my height is the benchmark.

"So, is kuppamma taller than akila?"

" Is her sis in law taller than her?"

"Is suppamma(who in most probability will be in her 8th std) as tall as akila?"

And to add fuel to fire, I was standing next to a cousin of mine who is way shorter than I am. She suddenly looked at me and shouted to her son," Look, Akila has grown taller". After coaxing her to shut up, I convinced her that I was just the same height when I left two months back.

While I was in Chennai, my brother, sis in law to be, uncle and aunt landed from the states. They were a jing bang by themselves. Add/subtract a few more, we formed a whole village when we went shopping. Everytime I landed to go shopping, the whole jingbang would rate me on what I wore.

The verdicts were anything from " Oh the bharthiya nari" , if I wore a salwar kameez to
"You have changed. You are a metro girl now", when i wore a pair of jeans.

The whole race of tam brahms is obssessed about commenting on looks.

After they have exhausted all possible ways to comment on how I looked, the next inevitable topic(apart from asking about how I am faring in my job in Coke and giving a cynical smile) is about my vocal stylings.

As a Tam brahm child, I went through the stage where my mum was competing with other mums regarding my upbringing. So I was put into music classes for a whole lot of years.

I learnt for almost 5 years after which I did what I was good at - quitting. I mouthed the words I QUIT.

But my relatives have short term memory. They remember the days when I learnt music but conveniently ignore the fact that I have stopped singing.

The tam brahm ladies in their kanchipuram sarees are nothing short of bullies when it comes to this. When you learn music, they bully you into singing for them. They then correct even the smallest mistake you make and when you stop singing is when their real fun begins.

Imagine this. You are sitting in a pooja with a lot of other people and when the time comes for sangeetha seva,(I am wondering in my head, if sangeetha seva(i) is actually a type of sevai(a tamil delicacy)) all the mamis/aunties who are musical exponents shut up and one random bully maami will call out " Akilaaaaaaaa, why dont you sing?"

I would look around for the other Akila who they are calling, only to realise to my dismay, I am the only Akila in the room.

The next degree of torture is when they take it upon themselves to ask me why I had stopped studying music. Some even give me a motivational speech( a la shiv khera) so that I can realise that my aim in life is to study carnatic music and make my race proud.

The next most entertaining activity of the mamis is to offer me strings of jasmine flowers to wear. I am quite moody about flowers and I very rarely wear flowers.
But in the tam brahm way of life, it is a sin for a girl to not wear flowers.
It is a bigger sin, (of the order where you will be burnt in cauldrons of oil) if you refuse flowers offered by bully maamis.

The bully maami will offer you a string of orange kanakambaram flowers which no person in her right minds will wear(it smells sick and is bright orange/violet in colour).
If you refuse, then the wrath of the God and the bully maami will burn you down.

So when I was a kid, I tried the refuse and be burnt down route, but to no avail. Then I took my lessons from days of bargaining for autos. When the bully maami approaches me, I first try going out of sight. After she hunts me down, we debate on the length of the strings of flowers. I will offer proof of how short my hair is, inform her that I have no clip etc and we finally come to a compromise and I take the flowers from her. After she is out of smelling circumference, I take a walk, find an empty table/chair and leave the flowers on it.

I realised today, that I am quite low on brand value in the tam brahm bully maami rating scale.

I have done an MBA and not an MS.

I am still in India and dont work for a software firm.

I work for Coke which according to most people is more dangerous than Mahim beach's sweet water(which might have been sewage according to few scientists)

I cant cook.

I cant sing.

Last overheard a few relatives were talking about the next big PROBLEM in my father's life: Finding a groom for me.

The mohalla is set for the mehendi function. Now it is time for maamis to showcase to the world that I have two left feet.The wedding will bring on value additions from kuppa, suppa and muppa about most things under the sun- ranging from the way I walk, to my sari colour to my jewels or rather absence of jewels to work to home to size of my bindi to length of my pallu.

Bring it on baby... Cant wait for a marriage hall full of bully mamis.

A quiet sunday evening

2006-08-16T20:27:00.000+05:30

I passed through the Aiyappan temple on my way to work everyday. I have used it as a landmark when I haggle with the auto guys. I kept promising the Lord I would come and visit him sometime. After almost 3.5 weeks, I went to the temple.

As I stepped in, I felt like I had almost forgotten how it felt like to be inside one. I havent been to a temple in ages now. There was almost nobody in the temple. That is when I love to visit temples- when most people stay away from it. I will never be found in a temple on a crowded/spl/festival day.

Had a handful of payasam, went around the place and left.

As I walked out, I felt glad. I was glad that I was in a city in which I was not an alien.

I took an auto and found my way to the Santhome church nearby.

The Santhome church, is one among three churches in the whole world, to be built on the same land as the tomb of an Apostle of Jesus. The two other places are St.James basilica and St.Peters Basilica(Rome).

I went in. It was almost 6 yrs back when I had last stepped into a church.

I walked in. Not knowing where to sit, I used the Hindu principle- the spot closest to the deity. I found myself right in front.

I gazed at the statues of Jesus and his two apostles and almost naturally I started chanting "Nivasatu hridi bala nitya kalyana sheela" , the words that Kanchi bala periyava had taught me.The chant that I said whenever I passed by a temple. the chant that rose to my lips whenever I was in front of God.

After I finished the chant, it struck me and almost naturally(and of course foolishly), I wondered if Jesus would understand me. There I was, wearing the sandalwood prasad from the nearby ayappan temple, chanting my nivastu hridi, in a church.

I saw a few people walk right upto the altar. I was not sure if I was allowed to do that. How many times have you got past to the main shrine in a temple??

I waited and watched what people were doing? It was not like I had never been to a church, but this one was very different. I stopped a lady and asked her if I could go to the altar. She said "Oh yes, and the tomb is right behind". Oh shucks, I had forgotten about the tomb.

I walked upto the altar and found it strange standing in front of the Lord with my slippers on.
On going nearer I found that The Lord there had been given an Indian touch. His robe had names of devotees all over it.

John Elias, jack, christopher...etc have been delivered from all evils because they have written their name on the statue of the Lord in Santhome church.

There was a door at the back which lead to the tomb of St. Thomas. The borad outside said "footwear this side". It was okie to wear the slippers in front of the Lord but not in front of his apostle I thought.

I climbed the stairs down to the tomb and sat there for a few minutes. I racked my brain for a hymn/chant that I had used in my 14 yrs of convent education and the only one that managed to come up was hymn that I had sung in Choir for St. Teresa of Avila. Not bad. better than Nivasatu Hridi bala , I thought to myself. I hummed it and found my way back to the main church.

As I walked out, I started thinking about what my experience had been in Chennai...

(To be contd.)

I wish

2006-08-09T19:47:00.000+05:30

In the past few days while I was at work, I found myself thinking almost several times in a day, I wish....

As a child, I was not let into any of the secrets at home, for my parents knew that I would never manage to keep a poker face about it.

Birthday gifts, surprise dinners/parties- I wasnt told about anything till the last moment. Let in the brat and she will giggle and spoil the secret, they said to all.

I wish someone had taught me to lie straight faced.

As a child my parents taught me to be sincere. They laid endless stress on being truthful. I wish they had laid a little less stress on that.

I wish someone had told me that it was okie to lie a bit.

I was taught to be straight forward. I was taught to be ethical.

I wish I hadnt taken them so seriously. I think that I am a bit too ethical and straightforward for my own good.

At home, there was always the stress on what others thought about us.

I wish I didnt take others so seriously as I do.

I wish my education had included impression/image management as a major.

I wish I didnt wear my emotions on my face as often as I do.

I am jinxed. So jinxed that whenever I plan something, it never works.I wish I could endlessly plan and not be worried about whether my plans will work or not. I only wish I could realise the joy of seeing my dreams in real.

I wish I could dance. I really do.

I wish I could stare at the sun.

I wish I could walk in a straight line.

I really really wish I could speak slower.

I wish I didnt feel so bad when I realise life is moving at a pace faster than I am.

I wish I could just close my eyes tight and pray enough for my wishes to be granted.

2006-08-03T19:54:00.000+05:30

Have you ever stood on the edge of a railway platform.
And when you are standing there on your tip toes, the train suddenly whizzes past you, trying to pull you with a force which you ward off by backing a few steps?

And after those few steps back, you think how stupid an action that was to stand in the edge of the platform. Yet, several seconds later you cross the same edge and step into the train which had whizzed past you. few minutes later you are whizzing past similarly stupid people.

Now that am in Chennai am trying to reach all my old friends. Chanced upon a friend today. She announced a few minutes into the conversation that she was getting married.

Simple enough. 23 yr old girl getting married was fine. Nothing unnatural about it.

Just that fact I have known her almost all my life, since the time we wore pig tails to school completely freaked me out.

She went on in the same breath to tell me that another friend of ours was expecting a child in a few months time!

That did it. I went into what Anish calls the retarded mode.
I called amma for help.

I called all friends possible and announced the news. I was happy for both my friends.

Yet, there was this feeling that I was standing by this platform and life just went whizzing past me.....

For the perfect drink- add water, sugar, concentrate and pinch of pesticide!

2006-08-03T19:11:00.000+05:30

So what am I upto these days?

I am travelling like crazy. I am travelling to places whose names cant be pronounced my co intern.

I am acting as his translator- his window to the rest of the world- by deciphering what people around him are talking in tamil. In the process am also getting him beaten up by conveying the opposite of what he means.

He wanted me to tell the cook that the food was good and that as they say in North India" Unke haathon ko choomna chahtha hoon". Well in South India no one kisses anyones hand for good cooking. They say usually put it as "I will buy a golden bangle for the person who has cooked such great food." And the prospect of my friend kissing the cook's hand was beyond imagination. So I told blankly told the cook "Murthy Anna, Anish here wants to make a golden bangle for you". Murthy anna gave Anish a dirty stare. Last I heard, Anish's coffee had no sugar!!!!

Ya, and as the news mentioned yesterday, I am also adding pesticides to my drink!

People who have visited the plant, often ask us at the end of the plant tour, " So where do you add the pesticides?"

There are friends who message me now, (who havent messaged in ages), "oye, kya be... whatzup! I heard you are adding pesticides". Ya I just walked across the road, bought a gram of DDT and added it to Anish's coffee when Murthy Anna missed adding sugar to it.

As I saw this particular social worker cry herself hoarse on National TV, I couldnt but help my sessions with my social worker roomies back in TISS. The saner ones of the lot, who happen to be my very good friends, would hear me out fully though they never fully believed me.

I was always seen as the blood sucking corporate, adding pesticide to a drink and making millions.

I had this conversation with a very close friend, whom I would label- intelligent.

Akila: " So you think soft drinks are dangerous"
Friend:" yaya...very much"
Akila:"Why?"
Friend:"Because , hmmm, you know it is carbonated and causes stomach disorders"
Akila: " so why do they sell soda on streets?Isnt that supposed to give ease from stomach troubles?"
Friend:"Ya, but they ARE DANGEROUS"
Akila:" okie, but why?"
Friend: " No da, they add this substances to it, you know... its bad"

Several you knows later, I convinced him of what I thought. I think he agreed with me because he wanted me to stop talking!

My roomie from TISS had demonstrated outside the Palakkad plant. Knowing her, I asked if she truly felt for the issue? She said she was more fascinated with the idea of doing a dharna than anything. They were a group of budding social workers who had visited the Plachimada plant.
The minute they got down from the bus, the organizers invited them to shout slogans. And there it was in the papers next day- TISS STUDENTS PROTEST OUTSIDE COKE PLANT.

I think they forgot to mention somewhere in the column that coke recruits regularly from TISS!!!

If only this Nation would for once lend a ear for scientific facts, eye for details, a sense of logic.

If only it had a will of its own.

As I watched the news item on TV, I could almost imagine the consumer on the street thinking twice before picking up a drink- why? its got that stuff you know.

I could almost feel the nation swaying under the spell woven by the social worker.She claims that she is fighting for a cleaner nation.

I think she is just fighting for another 15 mins of fame.

The next time you drink/dont drink a soft drink- just remember drink it/dont drink if you want to. Drink it if you feel thirsty. Dont stop drinking it because someone is asking you not to drink.

THE SPOT!

2006-07-23T01:25:00.000+05:30

I kept telling myself- never get attached to any place. And just when I was almost successful at doing that, I came home.

At first is all the exhilaration of having come to the place I grew up, spent most of my life.

Then comes the state where I get used to being a fixture in that place and before I realise time flies and throws me back to where it all began. Its time to leave.
I was on the phone with a friend. He felt it was too noisy a location wherever I was standing. I was parked on the landing of the stairs. I told him I was in my favourite spot.

The space is shielded with a heavy iron door leading to a gate, both of which are always locked. On to my right is the stairs and behind me is the door to the ground floor.
Countless have been the days when I used to give the slip to people- I used to tell them,or rather announce " Am going upstairs", close the door and just stand there leaning on the iron door. The iron door had a fabrication a few inches at the top from which I could view the outside world. Being the shortest in the family, my height was never considered for anything- right from height at which mirrors were to be fixed to fabrications on iron doors!
And that was my favourite spot. The spot from where I watched people go by. All kinds of people- of whom I knew nothing, something to everything.The place was the perfect hiding place from the world. It was almost like an attic where I was staying under cover because I could watch the people pass by and no one would even notice me for only my eyes were visible from outside.
I made up imaginary conversations in my head, made up character sketches of people passing by, caricatures formed in my head about the neighbours.It was my very own story board.
I have stood there, innumerable hours, on the phone talking to people and simulatneously watching people pass by, carrying out duties of their mundane life.

Daddies dropping girlies at the school bus stop, teenagers chatting up just before they part ways, auto drivers wasting their life on the pretext of waiting for customers, aunties on their way to the temple, fighting couples, the cheap uncle in the opposite house, childhood friends who are now all grown up- all the mundane stuff.

It was the perfect spot to answer phone calls when guests came visiting(the kinds who want to know every single detail of what you do), share a secret with a friend over the phone. It was the best place to cry. With no lights on, no one could see me cry and with the door closed no one could hear me whimper. That spot where I was all alone in the midst of everyone . Visible and yet invisible.

As I stood there today, I wished I could carry that spot with me wherever I go. My spot where I can just be, like a fly on the wall, not disturbing anything around me and watch whatever is happening around me, shielded with so many doors that protect me from the world outside- the world I watched with like watching a film through a peep hole. My very own invisible cloak. If only I could take it wherever I go and watch the world pass by around me.

If only.....

Let them fight!

2006-07-22T19:26:00.000+05:30

Ah, today was nice.
I felt I was truly back to being myself.
I am at home. Have been for the past 3 days.
I have been sleeping like crazy.
I had my tea and cookies, read my book, watched my share of TV, read some poetry on the net.
I have no idea what lies ahead of me. Not even the next day. I havent planned for the next minute.
I am back to being myself.
Guess thats what home does to you.

I had a discussion with my brother today. He was wondering what I felt about the whole blogger issue.
I told him-
" To me, it is just a news item. Just another news item of which I happen to be a miniscule part of.A news item which is progressively moving from first page importance(9 O' clock news material to) 8th page importance. By the time it reaches the last page, the search algorithms would have got corrected, people might have moved on to different blog sites.
I dont want my fifteen minutes of fame. There are people who have taken the mantle of being the spokesperson for all hurt bloggers. But to me, The government has closed the door, locked it with a huge lock, got two guards and left the window open.
I can still write. I can still log into blogger.com. As long as they dont stop me from writing, the rest of the world can fight for me."

Pssst: Just as I published this piece and tried viewing the blog...hurray it worked...I told you...it eventually will!!!! I think I just stepped into the threshold of free riding.

I am a male.... shoemaker/sailor!

2006-07-17T17:25:00.002+05:30

My reviews went off well and now am off to Chennai- TAM LAND

According to http://www.thebigview.com/pastlife/index.html

as in this life my past life has been quite sad and uninteresting and if not anything mundane!!!!!!!!!

Your past life diagnosis:
I don't know how you feel about it, but you were male in your last earthly incarnation.You were born somewhere in the territory of modern North Japan around the year 775. Your profession was that of a sailor or shoemaker.
Your brief psychological profile in your past life:Such people are always involved with all new. You have always loved changes, especially in art, music, cooking.
The lesson that your last past life brought to your present incarnation:Your lesson is to learn discretion and moderation and then to teach others to do the same. Your life will be happier if you help those who lack reasoning.
Do you remember now?

Of course....I do...

Good byes and such things

2006-07-13T11:32:00.000+05:30

I am almost done with my first stint- my sales stint.

And I thought life seemed long and endless.

It has been almost three and half weeks in Ghaziabad and noida.Three and half weeks of sales , of various kinds of illness, of various blood tests, of various doctors, of various drivers.

As i prepare to move on from here ,I go through within myself this strange feeling- of leaving. Well face it I am not exactly a great fan of this place. but....

I feel like what Suketu mehta often says in his book "Ullo".Ya an idiot who has been conned by yet another city into believing I belong there.

My driver asks me " Madam aaj last day hai?(is it your last day?) My usual retort to such questions is " Ya since I am going to be dying , this is my last day." I have used that line shamelessly through various times- Last days in school, engg college, TISS.

He goes on about how much his mother wanted to make a nice home cooked meal for me( This driver of mine happens to be one of the richest people in Ghaziabad. He lives in the most posh locality here and as he says, he drives around for fun. His name is Anurag Saxena. He could well be an investment banker with a name like that and definitely a far cry from Pushpinder!!)

He asks me" Tho madam Chennai mein power cut hai?"

I used to keep thinking how Mumbaikars make the most mundane thing in life bigger than life- train timings. Any mumbaikar who travels by train will adjust his life according to the local train timings and that defines his life. Just when the 5:15 fast left, as crowded as the virar fast.....

All his verbs and adjectives will be in some manner related to his train. His friends are those from the train.

In Noida, it is the power cut. Life is shrouded by things to be done when the current is there and what to do when it is not.

I tell him " Bhaiyya mujhe patha nahin."( I dont know)

He is surprised and reaffirms if I am from Chennai.
I say no.

Oh then you must be from Tamilnadu? ( I will forgive him)

The truth is I dont know anything about Chennai. Ask me if it is okie in Coimbatore I might have a vague idea.Mumbai, I thought I knew but only of the little world that I was a part of. There are so many parts to Mumbai I cant even fathom.

The truth is I really dont belong anywhere.

I never felt I had assimilated what Coimbatore's inner fibre was all about, I didnt imbibe Mumbai's spirit, I wonder if Ghaziabad and Noida have one.

As much as I am living a life I have always wanted to, it isnt close to what I was expecting it to be.

As I move on from this place, I wonder if I am any close to finding the city I truly belong to.Yet as I leave each city I let myself into being fooled that it has been home to me for whatever little time. I recount the good and bad times and sometimes as in this case, be thankful while saying my goodbyes.

The effect I have on ppl!

2006-07-11T17:22:00.000+05:30

This friend of mine had picked up The kite runner, which happens to be one of my all time faves.

So he had this conversation with me. After the conversation I noticed 2 horns on my head!!!

fd98698: dude I am at the end of the book
cuttysark555: cool i will tell ending
cuttysark555: :))
cuttysark555::D
fd98698: but I do not have guts to read on as I know something sad is gonna happen
cuttysark555::P
cuttysark555: u want to know if itz sad or happy ending??
fd98698: could not sleep on sunday after reading that book man
cuttysark555::))
cuttysark555: sooper macchi!
fd98698: I know its sad...
cuttysark555: hmmmmmmmm..........
fd98698: ok dude will read it today...
cuttysark555: I THINK U WANT TO KNOW WHAT IS THE ENDING
cuttysark555: i will tell U
cuttysark555: in the end....
fd98698: NOPE
cuttysark555: they all go and ......
fd98698: I am logging out
cuttysark555: bruhahahahaha - the evil laugh!

HOMEWARD BOUND

2006-07-10T16:29:00.000+05:30

I am bach and I am leaving this place called Ghaziabad(which incidentally happens to be among the ten most dynamic cities of the world according to a survey by Newsweek)

It is bye bye to the land of roti and makkan(albeit for a short while) and holaz to the land of idly and dosa!!!

I am going to CHENNAI!!!!! yohooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!

It is almost like breaking fetters and running free.

I keep imagining how nice it would be to speak in tamil again.I would meet people who understand why I speak the way I do. I am going to madras!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not to mention the joy of reading The Hindu everyday instead of having to wake up to Mallika Sherawat's half clad pictures and nonsense ramblings of socialites.

I keep imagining how horrible it will be to meet southy men again-men who would wonder why I am working and not getting married, men who would comment on every metre of cloth I wear.

I am looking forward to see the metro chennai my friends keep bragging about.

Best of all I will be a nights journey away from home. Nothing can beat the joy of having near and dear ones at an arms length!

My friend Hari(who writes nonsense comments in every piece I write) informs me with glee that I am going to get roasted alive. He also takes cheer in telling me I have to commute for almost 1 hr to work everyday!!

But buddies I have survived Delhi/noida/ghaziabad. I am ready to take chennai head on!!!!

2 much hai

2006-07-07T17:52:00.000+05:30

Ads which have got me cracking in the past few days:

1)heard on red fm:

PRINCE PHARMA presents " 2 MUCH HAIR OIL"

First of all Prince pharma sounds like a company that can only be named by an erstwhile classmate of mine(Tissians am sure u know who)!

and second of all- 2 much hair oil? I thought nature power soap( southy soap brand) was funny but 2 much hair oil takes the cake.

Seen in sector 18 noida( a posh shopping locality):

2)FAMILY SWIMSUITS AVAILABLE HERE.

Now, wonder why its is called family. Like chandler says to monica looking at her fat days swimsuit"that could cover manhattan", I think this is a one swimsuit for all package.

Greetings!

2006-07-07T17:39:00.000+05:30

I am bach and if you have been a loyal reader of my blog you should be replying- am mozart.

When you are working so hard- hard enough to save an organization from crumbling, accessing your mail and blog from your lap top becomes a luxury. A luxury that I have been granted today!!

My sales office just got shifted- from a residence building to something to a semblance of an office.

An office with no fans. Some bright soul thought- Why need a fan when u have an AC. Well unfortunately the bright one forgot that we are in Noida- the land of power cuts.

people here cant walk because they are slipping in their own sweat. They cant type becuase the sweat makes the keyboard go haywire

The AC doesnt work on generator back up and so here I am sweating by the gallons making up stupid trivia in mind.

for eg:
If all the sweat oozed in this noida office was to be collected it would serve to wash the leaning tower of Piza once.

gross aint i?

My sales stint is coming to an end.Coming up next is a review at the division office where I have to make a fancy ppt with flying objects and try and con ppl into thinking that I have indeed worked and that my data makes sense.

After that I am off to a location which has not yet been confirmed.

Watch this space for details of that lucky location.

The world is green!

2006-07-01T11:03:00.000+05:30

After shelling out a bomb for my phone bill this morning, I walked out of the hotel Kangaal(Pauper) Had worked up a bill of 9500 bucks for my employers by way of food and hotel rent. Thank God, I didnt have to pay that!!!

As I walked out of the hotel, with absolutely no money in hand, my driver brought a car in front of me. NO AC. NO RADIO and wait there is more...the driver didnt know his way to the office.My phone currency was running out.

Damn. Today sure is my lucky day.

Stopped at the ATM nearby to replenish my resources.

Voila!!! My salary had been credited.

MY FIRST EVER SALARY.

What a feeling!!!!!!!!

Wish I had worked the first five days of the month, so that I could have got my full share.
Actually nah! Am quite happy with this.

Calls went flying- first to folks.

then to other co interns- "Buddies, the moneys has arrived" Ah I like being the harbinger of good news. The heralder of hope.

LET THE CELEBRATIONS BEGIN!

Alas, no one to celebrate with!

Wishlist: New wallet to carry all the money

Color of the month: GREEN

I felt like the Mcdonalds Ad...tarapum papa..... i am loving it...

My first ever hard earned green notes. Okie now am pushing it.

So off I go to work today and ya, earn more!!! While the youth of India can waste their lives by ambling out of malls with PYT(pretty young things) .

PS:

I except all congratulation messages only over phone.
I also except cash, gift vouchers, credit cards, any other form of material loving!!!!

That will be the day!

2006-06-30T20:10:00.000+05:30

Started today with max enthu. Why? Because I had not done much work yesterday. Simple aint it?

Anyways. Started my day at sector 18 today. Sector 18- noida- where all roads lead to the mall.

Entered this place called Top Breads in the same sector.

suave? no

swank? no

hmmmm, I am still searching for a word to describe this place.

aH, Well NICE. That is the word.

It is a small, nice , little place. I entered to find the owner talking to the manager. After exchanging a few words with Tarun(owner)he granted permission to randomly pick out people and make them answer my seemingly stupid questions.I took my position- geared to pounce on unwitting customers who entered the shop to answer my questionnaire.

There were not many customers at that point of the day. So i chose a nice little table for myself- a two seater, right next to the salad bar, took out my book and started on it.

The manager was gracious enough to order a lemonade for me.

Now I havent heard the word lemonade in ages. The last time I heard of it was when I was reading Enid Blyton. Lemonade, orangade, kidney pie. Enid Blyton made even milk sound yummy in her books.

I got a green liquid in a huge glass and saw mint leaves floating on top. Ah mint, the perfect coolant for the summer. The drink superceeded my expectations.

It was perfect. The salad bar, the leamonade, the book, the manager Mr.Banerjee (who was an elderly gentleman who was really sweet with me and had no issues with me hanging around)

The place was all set, waiting for the customers to arrive. The bread was freshly baked. The donuts had just been placed on the shelf, the pastries looked exciting. The tea was brewing. The salad bar had just been set. Macaroni, veggies to chicken. Everything! Chilled and ready to be taken away.

I sat there in my corner soaking in every sight of this place. The ambience was to my liking- Wood all over the place.

I sat there and watched the people who came in. The things they bought. I troubled a few of them with my questions. But technically I could have just been sitting there the whole day.

I missed my near and dear ones when I saw friends and family meet up there.

I tried to make up ideas in my head as to what people might be thinking when they came into that place. I conjured up imaginary dialogues between two girls(one who resembled my sister in law) , an angry young lady who walked in fuming, another lady with her kid and pink motorazr.

I was amused by the sight of a very elegant lady who hopped skipped and jumped at the sight of a salad bar. She took a cup and started filling it. Five minutes later she was still piling on the salad in her cup.

I knew I could have easily become a fixture in that place. Someone who sat there all day with her book and ya, ate her salad and drank her lemonade too!

It wasnt one of those pseudo places where the TV was turned on but was on mute with the music blaring loud. Both of it was playing. But you couldnt mistake one for the other. Neither did it interfere. Taste-that is what they call it. Taste.

I truly wished I could have been with my bro and rajini there. It seemed like a place they might have liked too!(They claim to be classy-cant help this wink;))

I reluctantly reminded myself that I had work beyond top breads. So i wrapped my questionnaire session. Thanked Mr.Banerjee . On my way out I swore to myself that I would be back there if ever I write a book. With my notebook and music I will be there- in the table by the salad bar.

chut mut

2006-06-30T16:52:00.000+05:30

Taking a well deserved break from my market visit right now.

I am out in the blistering and if I can add barnacles sun, while the youth of India waste themselves away in AC offices. Now that I have rubben in enough that I am working hard I shall promptly move on.

My thoughts are into two parts. The first part is as follows. The next one will follow when I am a bit more relaxed and not so burnt out(I dont miss a chance to show off).

I realised, at the danger of sounding like the recent peter england ad, that what I want in life is really the smaller things.

Small joys in my life take precedence over most things.

Small joys of going to a nice bistro with family/friends. I have never gone on a nice lunch with my brother(Blame it on coimbatore which has nothing close to what is in the metros/other cities). I would love to go on a nice lunch/sunday brunch with my brother and my to be sister in law-Rajini.

I was sitting in this nice cafe today when a girl passed by me and she looked like my sister in law. The funny part I havent really met this Rajini person. But, it is quietly sinking into me that she is going to be immediate family and soon at that. Wouldnt it be lovely to get dressed nicely and go out for lunch with bro and rajini?

Small joys which rush into my heart when I see a salad bar in a quiet way side cafe.

Simple ones when offered a lemonade with mint instead of an iced tea.

Of course meeting loved ones whom you havent met in a long time.

And much simpler when people are more nice to you than expected.

Life for me is in the smal, l'il, chut mut, things.

But contrary to what life is, the stress is on the bigger things in life and I guess it is back to my market visit for me.

Trapped

2006-06-29T19:08:00.000+05:30

I entered the hotel after work today. At the entrance I noticed a lot of bedecked aunties. Oh not another party in the hotel, I thought to myself. Loads of Dinchak dinchak music again!

I was waiting for the elevator to come. When it reached my floor, another bevy of aunties came out of the elevator. Before the last one could step out the elevator door closed. Weird, I thought, because that was much lesser in time than what it usually takes to close. I helped her by pressing the elevator button from outside. I got in along with another girl and her mum. The aunty was holding her younger kid. Ah, cherubic I thought to myself looking at the kid. The elevator door closed and before I could press the third floor button, it started moving down. I thought someone must have called the elevator down. But NO!
The door opened again and I stared at concrete walls in front of me.

THE LIFT WAS STUCK!

okie calm. Press the alarm button as the instructions pointed out.

I pressed the alarm button only to realise it didnt work.

FREEZE! Isnt this one of those moments where you start panicking?

When you start thinking why you havent told your loved ones how much you love them?

How much you wish you werent there and elsewhere doing something else? Everything that movies, music, sitcoms tell you.

Well, to my surprise I turned out to be quite hmmm, optimisitic.

I had this feeling that nothing would happen.

We felt two jerks. I thought, "ah, the rescue mission is on".

I was mistaken again. The elevator door opened again and people asked if we were ok.

Ya sure. I am okie. I am in a elevator. Concrete walls staring at me. I sure am okie!!!

The door closed. The girl kept shouting" We are going to die!!Let me press some button and see" . I had half a mind to slap her. We started suffocating a bit. The tension was in the air.

The kid broke out into a whimper. The aunty joked with it saying,"why are you crying?"
The aunty was damn realistic.

She said, " We are not going to fall down and die" - How nice and optimistic like me.

She continued"We might just suffocate and die"

The door opened again. I could hear and see people above me. We were in between two floors. They passed us a chair and we all climbed out.

I came out. Started walking up the stairs as though nothing had happened. Reached my room.

Sat on the bed.

I noticed that my hands were shivering. It struck me. SHIT!!

SHIT.....OH MAN! SHIT!

happy high

2006-06-26T19:08:00.000+05:30

I am a slightly happier person now. I have got my project.
This afternoon my boss called me to his room and decided to put an end to my chill out sessions.
He thought, thought, and thought.Finally landed on a particular topic. He was sweet and gave me a nice project about which I have no idea about.When I went downstairs to ask a few existing employees data on the particular project all that they did was snigger. One was gracious enough to say "heheheheeh.So you are the bakra for this project Huh??"
So i decided to start my market visit today. I was roasted and fried mid way through my list of outlets and was happy to see a mall on my market list. Entered the mall and started sipping some ice tea and sat there in the pretext of strategizing my project.

revelation of the day: My drivers name is Pushpinder and not Uspinder. I am really bad at this UP accent.

He was busy perfecting his vanishing act and I was victim to it almost thrice today.

I got out of the mall and realised I am too tired. How did i realise that? I was smiling to myself for no reason(Please refer to earlier blogs about how I can get high without drinking)I even felt like Elaine in seinfeld after she had downed some pain killer tablets. I saw an army truck pass by and thought they looked like the guys from Beverly Hilly billies!
I kept laughing.I was too damn tired. I started outsourcing my work by sending Pushpinder to find out where the shops were. Only if he confirmed it was existing and not closed down did I get out.
Meanwhile Pushpinder would locate all the possible PCO s and make calls to his girl friend much to my annoy.
I also realised that youth in india have no ambition.
I also feel they are conspiring against me.
All day all i could see was trendy youth ambling about in the streets, walking aimlessly with characters called boyfriends/girlfriends.
Man while I work my ass off here, all that they do is NOTHING. Gee, I am adding so much value to the nation(now I am blabberring)
I saw a school girl walking with her books and all I could think was" Man wish I could go back to campus/school days(not engg college but)"
I guess its all a mirage.
Anyways. I am off for the day.
I am still laughing.

Just chill.....chilll....just chill....

2006-06-26T11:35:00.000+05:30

I am back in office. My boss is super busy today and has asked me to chill out till evening.
Went to a relatives house and fell asleep promptly. I havent done a thing in the last week but I have been working and sunday is the only day I get off. So i slept off. This is called cognitive psychology.
I am done with my share of throwing a few words which people have to google up and understand.
I am off till my boss calls me to brief me about the project.
Until then I am going to be reading blogs and "chilling out" just like my boss has asked me to.
I am also eavesdropping on all the sales people.My sales region has not had a very great month. So i guess it is going to be a lot "f***" in the air today.

one day at a time

2006-06-24T15:11:00.000+05:30

On a quiet saturday afternoon
While I wait for my boss to come
While everyone ignores my presence on messengers
Lest I ask them to read my blog and comment
Life seems endless.
Three weeks at my first job have passed
I still feel like I am doing field work at TISS.
Looking at my management trainee t shirt with my company name on it, a colleague remarked
"oh that is nice. You need the t shirt. It gives a lot of enthu"
I am ready to wear 5 of those t shirts if I have to.
Life seems long and winding.
I am here unwillingly at this phase while all I want to do is go back to my earlier ones.
While am supposed to be all happy and chirpy and tell the world
"Hey look I have arrived",
I am just able to manage a feeble"I am still here- hanging but here"

A brand new day and some resolutions for the same!

2006-06-24T10:36:00.000+05:30

Good morning Ppl!
I am at work. Today is the day I get to know my first project. (yes I work on saturdays. I am in a sales office remember?)
A friend of mine called me(on long distance) and said " Your blog is thankfully showing signs of getting better. Atleast it sounds remotely english"
I am enraged!! So I have decided to
1) Spell check all my entries.2) Format well3) Use punctuation appropriately4) Avoid the .... and the !!!!!!( I know for sure one friend who will be disappointed if I do this)5) Write at a speed which is much lesser than the speed of my thought(Which is the reason for all the errors)
My dad has managed to fish out a relatives address in Ghaziabad.So am off to their place for sunday. Some yumm food is on the cards.
I am also working on some tactics to get all my readers to comment on my blog. Any ideas please leave as comment(Normally I would have added a ;) and !. But I shall abstain.)
Have a great weekend people.

Of drivers and kings

2006-06-23T17:21:00.000+05:30

Holaz to everyone...
After a tiring route ride, i went on a marathon reading session. I am currently engaged with "maximum city". I chose this book deliberatley because I am missing my days and friends in mumbai.
Unto a new a day and some new revelations.
My luck with car drivers has been quite bad. My driver at home -sankar has been with us for ages. But even today he can single handedly spoil my dad's mood due to bad driving.
Sankar used to drop me in school and college. He knew all my friends and would be angry with me if I didn't introduce my friends to him. He also knew which girl was going with which guy and hence would act as my personal gossip updater.
In college he was known to give a complex to my acquaintances. Every morning, I would be late and would speed till my college. The stretch from the entrance to the gate, he would speed like he was schumi's long lost trainer(also because i used to cry my throat hoarse that I was getting late). He even used to have juvenile speed contests with equally juvenile kids from my college. My classmate was once enraged with sankar trying to race with him. I was in the car studying for a test when sankar was trying to compete with this classmate. My colleague was completely convinced that i was egging my driver to do so while poor me was completely oblivious to what was happening around me.
Sankar's ideal world would be a road rash setting. the kinds where he can take a whip and lash out at near by drivers. Anyone trying to overtake sankar was a sinner and had to atone for it.
Sankar had no regard for dogs, cats, and at times even weak human beings scurrying past his vehicle. He was the king od the road.His vehicle was the best on the road. Any vehicle smaller than his had no right to overtake him. That rule would also apply to vehicles bigger than his.
He had a physical appearance to match up to this image. A bit portly, he had a moustache which would send virumandi scurrying into the jungle, veerappan cowering in fear. He was almost like a dacoit on the road. He usedto scare the hell out of the women on the road. His comments on women were scathing.
There was this girl who used to stay in our locality. I met her at a party and she came up and spoke to me and said" your driver is a menace to our colony.". Everyday when this girl left for college, sankar would follow her in our car and drive very close to her and in the process scare the hell out of her.
Sankar was a hindu by birth and chritian by choice. this aided him surely in one manner- he got holidays for both diwali and christmas.
Sankar had a love marriage and there was time when he used to regale my brother with his town bus love stories.
He can make friends with great ease. So much so he even gets parking space in a lot which is full.
The thumb rule is Sankar will never be found near the car. He will always be found at a distance from which he can spot us but we cant spot him. He will be invariably found smoking.
Well the natural question would be why do still have him as our driver.
My dad has tried sacking him a million times. But he always comes back. Sometimes he attacks my mum by some emotional blackmail. Even my mum has given up on him now.
But sankar does have some mean moves and turns I must say.
So I am now in the land of Ghaziabad where drivers of skoda spit on the roads while driving. The company sent me a cab. The driver was USPINDER. The first day Mr. USPs came to pick me up he did a turn which cleaned the road and settled all the dust and mud in my lungs.
Mr.Uspinder entertains(?) me with his love story every day ( thats is approx. 2 hours).
Mr.Usps is also never found near the car. Neither is he found when I need to move urgently.
When he promises he will be there on time, he is ABSENT(as was the case today).
So today I got a driver, who asked me first thing in the morning" Madam, what time will you leave today?"
On my way to work, this man honked continously for almost 1.5 minutes. For what? There were two scooters driving in front of us. After he over took them he started honking again at a car which was way ahead of him. Another King of the road.
I saw my lady luck, sitting on the car hood smiling contently with glee.

Say a l'il prayer for me

2006-06-22T17:37:00.000+05:30

Our Boss, who never art in office,

Hallowed be thy Name, thy race.

Thy kingdom have I come.

In my appraisal will thy will be done.

On KRAs and performance bonuses.

Give us this day your precious time.

And forgive us our management trainee foolish pride

As we forgive those higher up who trample us.

And lead us not into weekly meetings,

But deliver us from route rides and depot visits.

For thine is the kingdom,

and the power,

and the glory,

for ever and ever.

Amen.

route riding

2006-06-22T15:25:00.000+05:30

We all use the terms "neither here nor there", "here and there", "us and them"....
Today i quite experienced what it was.
Now if all of you are waiting for some spice filled story waiting to unfold. hehehehe am sorry. I was just referring to my route ride.
what is a route ride?
Route ride is a well.... ahem.... a ride which the company offers you- on a tin truck.
This is so that you visit the market and understand sales first hand.
I have done enough of the route rides. Starting from summers induction, during my project, during my finals induction and now. But I think it is like a perfect managers tool.
HA...trainee...what do i do with her? I have no time- send her on a route ride.
These bloody management grads who have no idea about the market relaities, I hate them- Send them on route rides.
Route rides are nothing less than the torture chair-LITERALLY.
So today i found myself on the front end of the truck, sitting amidst the sales executive who also doubles up as the driver and not one but two of his helpers. So if you know your math well- that is four of us in a seat meant for 2-3.
These guys are very courteous to you if you are nice to them. But nio matter how courteous I am, I end up having a silent fight with one of the helpers for space to sit inside the truck.
So today I went on a 5 hour route ride with my butt....well half my butt on the seat and the other half on a ....guess what?? a pepsi crate!!!!!!!!!
The guys were very nice and they bought me tanda(coke/thumsup). You cant refuse them because then they will not accept you. You have to drink the tanda even if you are a non-csd drinker.
On the way I took a break and stepped into a barista and grabbed a few bites.
I got a free darshan of sector 18 in Noida today. I sometimes dont understand the logic. Sector 18 has everything. I mean everything. From Papa John's to domionos to pizza hut to punjabi by nature to sagar ratna to lavanya to subway.
We roamed around sector 18. Every shop i visted tempted me to eat something. But I chose not to. The breads inside top breads, the sweets inside nathu sweets.
I also understood what people mean by between the devil and the deep sea. I was inside the truck.The sun blistering above us. I refused to get down because of the heat. But inside I was having a free sauna effect and sweating by the gallons.
I remembered enid blyton's usage of the sentence"the heat lulled them to sleep". I even managed to fall asleep inside the truck during an exceptionally long waiting period.
Then in order to get a bit more active I got down and went around some stores. I saw a store by name add-ons. I thought what a sad name for a store. But stepped in anyways. Once inside I was greeted b a polite elderly gentleman. It was a book store. Neatly arranged unlike Galgotias. The cool air on my skin felt like heaven. Then I realised what I wanted to do in life- I want to run a book store.
I will be the ever charming host.MY books will be neatly arranged. I will not put my books on discount saying" Akila recommends". I will have nice huge, colorful cushions. A tea bar will be there. Hot muffins are a must.
crash..... That was MY DREAM ENDING. Am back to reality. Of sales offices and toilets that dont flush.

AMMINJIKARAI AND ARAKONAM

2006-06-21T12:03:00.000+05:30

While I was waiting in officefor my boss to come, a grand idea struck my head. This idea might help me achieve my dream of not having to work at all!!!
I have selected two places. These are potential high power cities. They are : Amminjikarai and arakonam.
I am going to build huge office buildings and ask all the corporates from the world to set up office there.
I will build office buildings in all shapes and sizes. Some offices will be in the underground.
These cities will have no public transport. So that all car companies can benefit from this and set up more factories here.
There shall be no safe place for people to stay on rent. So they will buy houses and this can send my real estates rates soaring.
I will also build malls so that people spend more on the junk food that gets manufactured in these cities.
I will also bring in some historical significance to my cities. Did you know Gurgaon was the place where Dronacharya's ashram was?
Well amminjikarai could have well been the place where T rajender had the inspiration for his songs.
and Arakonam could be the place which looks like half of the bermuda triangle when viewed from a helicopter.
For all those who are interested in investing in this idea of mine.....your money is in safe hands!

ONE BIG HAPPY FAMILY

2006-06-20T18:48:00.000+05:30

To all those have been missing me and my blog. I am Bach....
If you are like a friend of mine you will answer ," I am Mozart"....okie leaving my silliness behind, with no further due I
present to you MY LIFE!!!!!!
I am currently in Ghaziabad. My office is in Noida. I commute everyday for almost 90-100 minutes.
I have been put up in a hotel in ghaziabad. The reason being NOIDA IS UNSAFE.
I have got the better deal. My friends are currently in Jammu and Varanasi!
Yesterday I realised how creepy it can get to be alone. And parents freaking out on the other side of the phone doesnt
help at all. So to forget it all, I switched on the TV and ordered some food and drowned my sorrow.
I am currently learning the basic theoretical aspect of sales and will be thrown into the market from maybe tomorrow
onwards.
Well onto my thoughts.
I just realised that people in North India are completely ignorant of the existence of south India.
They just think of south india as a huge mass of land which produces coconut oil, idly vada sambhar.
All south Indians according to them are madrasis.
Conversations had in the past with other Indians.
Me: " I am from south India"
XYZ: " oh madras!!!"

ABC:"Isn't trivandrum a state?"
ABC(again)" I thought Bangalore was a state"
PQR: " Akila, I got your letter by fax. The ink was faded and I could barely make out the words Coimbatore. So I have entered
your location as chennai"
Me: " What?? It says coimbatore why would you enter chennai?"
PQR" It is all the same, isn't it?"
Me: " What??? noooooo. Okie Tamilnadu is a state and chennai and coimbatore are cities in that state"
PQR: " ya, that is true. But they just changed the name to chennai, didn't you know?"
Me: "oh?"

EFG:"You madrasis are so brilliant. I think it's because of the coconut oil you eat"
Me:" oh you mean the keralites"
EFG" Aren't you all the same?"

South Indian food means idly vada sambhar and masala dosa.
All south Indian movies are copied from hindi.
I have also noticed they are quite oblivious to our existence.
For eg. a North Indian would be offended if he hears two south Indians speak in tamil/mallu/telegu/kannada.
But if two north indians are talking in hindi you are expected to understand. If you dont you are expected to learn hindi.
SO my logic is shouldnt I also be offended that north Indians just presume I know Hindi?

I think south Indians are too tolerant. I also find south Indians wanting to ape the north Indians.
My brother's wedding functions include a mehendi ceremony. My sister in law is planning to wear a lehenga.The mehendi she is
going to wear is not the traditional south indian mailanji which takes 15 mins to apply but the north indian mehendi which
takes 3-4 hours to apply!
Have you ever heard a punjabi having valai kaapu function or wearing a nine yards saree?
If you tell a south indian girl that she looks like a north indian she will be pleased beyond explanation.
But if you tell a north Indian woman she looks like a south indian she will be offended!!!!
I have also noticed that south indians who have been settled in north india take pride in talking hindi fluently. But all my
north Indian friends who have lived all their life in south india hate to be heard speaking tamil in public!

I think we Indians are a hateful lot. The tamils think mallu's are kanji's while the mallus think we tams are pandis.The tams think telegus are goltis.
We all think bengalis are bongs and the bongs in turn think they are the superior of the lot.
If you are a parsi you are a bawa to the world, the marwaris are kanjoos while the gujjus are baniyas!
The townies think the pahadis are a dirty lot while the pahadis think the townies have come to dirty their land.

All in all we are one big bickering family!

In the corporate world also people are parochial but in a different sense. They are parochial about their departments.
The sales guy think sales drives the world. My friend kichu was right when she said " sales people know only one word- I"
Marketing and supply chain serve sales while HR is a useless burden for them.
The marketing guys are too suave to allow anyone come near them.
The supply chain guys think they run the company. The IT guys spy on all of them and reprt them.
Hr....hmmmm while all this happens HR is quite oblivious to the action and considers itself as the backbone while supports
the bickering organization.
The FMCG guys think, BPO/KPOs are useless while the BPO guys think FMCG as an industry is archaic.
The management consultants think they are here to save the lot while the rest of the industry think the consults are
brainless.
According to me everyone is qequally useless. We create a need, con the public by making them believe their life is
incomplete without it and sell the product.

I have noticed in the past few days that the whole of corporate India's favourite past time is HR bashing. Right from the
sweeper till the CEO love to indulge in this activity.

XYZ(thinking to himself) I am so bored. Want to take a break. Let me go kick some HR butt.

Nothing to talk in the meeting- kick some HR butt.

Feeling unimportant and useless-surefire remedy-kick some HR butt.

Today a friend who was done with his work tried to spend some time by indulging in some HR bashing.
A few minutes into the conversation I said" hey you know what? HR is useless. We do nothing. We trouble others. And guess what?? we get paid for this!!! While you slog your ass off and get paid peanuts...hmmmm...wonder why?"!
He was dumbstruck. He was feeling like" damn how can I continue this conversation?"

Maybe I am just going to write a book like shiv khera and say" Loser dont just bashing. they do Hr bashing". Okei sad one....sorry junta. Me got to run. The day has ended. Back to my main aur meri tanhayee!!!

And for all those who are useless,vella, have loads of time on their hands, lots of money to spare please call me and give me
company!!!!

change of plans

2006-06-13T19:52:00.000+05:30

You know how it is when you think of olden days and say"what stupid things we do" and probably even laugh over it?

I am considering my decision of choosing to be in the FMCG industry.

I am in fact considering my decision of doing an MBA.

In fact even my decision of dreaming of being an independent woman.

My ambition levels are at an all time low and I am completely ready to get married and settled down. But only to a rich young man.(Any takers?)

To be continued.......

SONA PANI....

2006-06-11T11:31:00.000+05:30

Before i begin on my ramblings, I want to clarify a few things.

**** Why dont i write something on a general note asked a friend of mine....everything in your blog looks like a personal diary.

Ans: I dont write because.....simple...I cant write! I write on what matters most to my heart. I write on what enthuses me to write. So if this something on a general note enthuses me...I will surely write..

Went for a lunch meeting to the DLF Golf course and country club last afternoon. What a place. Friends and other well bred co interns claim it is the best golf course they have ever seen.

In fact it had a quite commercial aspect to it. In the fact that residential buildings were coming up on either side who's USP was "view of golf course"!!!!

Anyways, after a decent lunch and a great dessert, I came to the conclusion that tamil brahmins as a race are cursed creatures.

We as a race lack the ability to smooth talk and pretend. We have forever been taught to be straightforward. So while the rest of the interns gushed " OH it is so beautiful"...."oh...this....oh that...." I sat there. I did speak...Of course. But only sense and when it mattered.

Have decided to learn the art of doing time pass talk..... which can be

"oh what lush green lawns"... This sentence has to be immediately followed by a sentence where you have to take either a brand name, some up market place.

"i think these are better than royal palms. Have you been to the The Club?"

I formulating a little book of nonsense ramblings in my brain and I think after 10 corporate dinners I can write a dossier.

But the boss who took us out for dinner seemed really nice.

This week we are leaving for sona pani- a small hill town near mukteshwar. A small trek to the resort owned by a couple. I have read earlier about this place. Shall write more after I come back.

We have an outbound training there where we have to do rappelling and other things. MY sense of balance and ability to walk five feet without falling is world famous. I am keeping my fingers crossed.

The locations that we will be headed to after this week were almost declared yesterday. While the lone guy in our group gets to goto Jamshedpur, two girls get to goto jammu and two get to goto east UP.

Considering my wonderful luck I think I will be heading for East UP soon. Maybe to Bareilly.

one month there and then again mystery about the locations.

But I listened quite carefully to the ppts and found the plausible locations. It can be

chandigarh, ludhiana, amritsar, taratala,dankuni(the last 2 locations are near kolkata)

So am off now.... travails of a kid turned corporate shall continue.....

did you know?

2006-06-07T20:30:00.000+05:30

After three days of induction my words of gyan…

DID YOU KNOW?

 BPW(BEVERAGE PARTNERSHIP WORLDWIDE) is a partnership between Coca cola and Nestle? So that means they co own all ready to drink beverages like nestea etc. But the same nescafe powder/vending machines belong to nestle. Only ready to drink beverages!!!!

Okie after that informative piece… here are some completely useless piece of information.

 My office has a bathroom inside the ladies loo which has glass doors….
Now I got curious because it was complete with shower and everything. Hmmmm…. Interesting
 It helps to use your CEO’s name every 5 minutes. Like I was with XYZ. XYZ had held me up. XYZ has called me. Now That shows how important you are.
 My favourite corporate phrase is “sorry?”. Now it’s not sorry…..it is sorry?
You have to say sorry? When you haven’t heard something properly. Sorry? When you are buying time for your boss’s question. Sorry? To express your disapproval of somebody’s comment. It is like f***/ fudge….sorry? except that whenever someone says sorry? I feel like blurting out eggjactly(for those who don’t get the joke watch salaam namaste)
 My other favourite words are flavour, unique, align,paradigm, strategize. You can use them anywhere, anytime. As long it is there it is good.
 My other favourite line is You know……
Frankly I don’t know…but since you insist ..maybe I do know!
The more years of experience you have, the more you knows you should use in your sentence. The less you have to speak the more you knows should feature in your sentence.

You know is the corporate version of yatayata yata!!!!

 Saw a really nice cover of an annual report. It had an outline of a contour bottle and said,” quick, name a soft drink in a second..” try it!
 There is no one mantra for success. There are lots. In fact everything is a mantra. Whichever works is the best mantra!
 Most companies have everything in the process(forever)
 I realised I hate being called babe by anyone except for my brother who calls me bayb!
 There will always be worldwide standards and worldwide exceptions in standards.
 Difference between Management trainees and summer trainees?
 Nothing MTs are treated with a bit more respect than STs. They are both equally unimportant and useless in a company and ya also the most easily forgotten in the organization. No organization chart has an MT/ST in it. So technically you are non existent.

 All big guys in the organization are nice as long as they are in minority and you are in majority. That is when statements like, “ please call me up when you feel you need some info”, “ I believe in an open door policy”, “ drop me a mail”. Try all this on a one to one basis and you are sure to get fired!
 I love fresh office supplies. They enthuse me to do work.
 People are inherently lazy
 Theory X rocks
 Theory Y rocks selectively.
 Half the brand names are cute but don’t mean in daily language. Snapple?? Fanta, springle???!
 Every brand manager is thinking of a 1000 things his brand means, but in real you don’t even think half of it applies.
 Coke was used as a headache medicine in olden days. I want to give some for Medha Patkar.
 Every department thinks it is the most vital dept. in the organization, except maybe HR!!!
 The most fashionable statement in corporate world is to say” I have a bad memory for names”. Wonder how come people remember their names:P!
 I am super sure that the work I am cut out to do is that of an office assistant.
 People love to bash the HR department. The sad part is they fail to realise they are equally useless.
 People love to take credit for whatever vague thing they hear.
 Anu is right when she says don’t make anything larger than life. Including your job…..
 Forgot to mention….hand movements while talking to people helps to distract them from hearing the shit you are talking. I use it all the time.
 I can get tipsy without drinking. I just need to be tired and listening to ppts the whole days. I start laughing for nothing and get all tipsy!
 And again….forgot to mention….an accent helps while in the corporate world. Even if you were born in ammijikarai and brought up in kammangarai.

Finally MY LAST AND FINAL PIECE OF INFO….cliched, but def. useful. Take pride in what you do and you will love it.

PS: I wrote all this in my notepad, throughout my third day of induction.That is why the disconnect in the points! Will collate them all and publish a book. You can be a corporate too!

come on...be another one to bite the dust- Join AMAMAEC

2006-05-25T16:24:00.000+05:30

So I was reading the papers and came across the feature which spoke about all the toppers.

The state topper was a quintessial iyengar with a namam that looked like he had drawn it with a drafter which he had bought in advance for his engineering drawing classes. He wanted to become an engineer and then do his management degree from an IIM. I went on to the next rank holder's statement.

He wanted to become.....Just then I went back to the earlier line what????????

An engineering degree then a management degree???! what has happened to the world???

He had just shattered the quintessial tam brahm dream of being an engineering and pursuing an MS or maybe he was reshaping the to be tam brahm dream!!!! He wanted to take up ECE...phew there was hope still....

When i suggested to my parents that I wanted to do Literature after school I got a response which sounded like " Oh Lord forgive her for saying that". I think currently the business to be in is the education business. Pretty easy I should say.

I am planning to start my own college.

ARUL MIGU AAL MARATHADI ARUNACHALA ENGINEERING COLLEGE( AMAMAEC)

Get a building, get some out of job engineers and ADVERTISE!!

100% PLACEMENT IN TOP MNC'S LIKE QUIPRO, GEETEEYESS, PINGOSYS.

WE OFFER COURSES IN COMP.SC, ECE, IT, EEE, MECHANICAL.

FIRST COME FIRST SERVE BASIS .

95% SEATS RESERVED FOR MGMT QUOTA

3% RESERVED FOR INTERNATIONAL STUDENTS

REST SEATS WILL BE ALLOTTED ON MERIT BASIS(SEE FOLLOWING PAGE OR OUR ADMISSION TEST FORMS)

INTERNATIONAL QUALITY IN TEACHING.

EXTRA COACHING FOR STUDENTS FOR PERSONALITY DEVELOPMENT BY THOUGHT LEADER EKAMBARAM(rS.1500/HOUR)

FREE LAPTOPS FOR ALL STUDENTS IN ORDER TO AID THEM WATCH EDUCATIONAL MOVIES.

I am sure there will be takers for this college. I am also planning to start engineering coaching right from eleventh standard. Like they teach 10th std syllabus in 9th std and 12th portion in 11th std. Anyways we are going to reach the hallowed portals of an engineering college. Might as well not waste time. This will facilitate enough time for students to study for TOEFL in first year and GRE in second year.

For the lesser mortals who have taken up civil engg and textile engg. I plan to schedule extra classes after college timing for training in C and C++ so that they can pursue a software job after graduation.

I also aim to provide a safe and sound atmosphere for students to study. Boys are not allowed to talk to girls both within and outside the campus premises. The phone lines will be tapped. I will also provide separate buses for boys and girls, separate canteen for boys and girls. Hostels will be far apart from each other. Girls can wear any dress to college as long as it is a salwar kurta and has a dupatta which is pinned on both shoulders. They are also requested to walk with one hand at the back and a finger on the lip for their well being.

My college will aim at a rigourous academic curriculum which any mani pani shani can pass by studying the previous years question papers. Since the first batch will not have this privilege the final exam question paper will be given as one of the revision exam papers. Students will not be told which revision exam paper is likely to come as the final paper.

Students who dont get placed in the final year or who have 2 or more arrears will be given an opportunity to teach the junior batches. My college will accept no donation.

Our fee structure is very realistic.
tuition fee: 30000
development fees :6000
internet fee: 1000
placement fees: 5000
breakage charges of hostels when students get irate with mgmt fee: 1000
hostel fees: 4000

Alla marathadi arunachala co-operative bank will help all students realise their great Indian engineering dream by disbursing educational loans.

I also have plans on the anvil to start a dental college, MBA college, two other engineering colleges- one in the name of my son aal marathadi pithambaram and one in the name of my daughter aal marath adi rajinieshwari.

COME JOIN US.... BECOME AN ENGINEER AND LIVE UP TO THE DREAM OF A QUINTESSENTIAL AVERAGE INDIAN. BE ANOTHER ONE TO BITE THE DUST

soul patrol!

2006-05-25T14:07:00.000+05:30

I have always hated the time difference between regions. It asks of me to stop thinking for a sec, calculate what time it would be for my brother before i Decide to wake him up for a silly request!

But this is one reason why I love the time zone thing!!!!I got to know who won American idol without having to watch a 2 hr special interspersed with more ads than the actual programme!!!

Taylor Hicks won American Idol 6!!!!!!!!

I havent heard much of his own music and I was rooting for Chris Daughtry. It is definitely a well deserved break from PYT KAT Mcphee!!!!!!

Herez to soul patrol....Kind of like the word....SOUL PATROL!!!

oops....!!!

2006-05-25T00:39:00.000+05:30

My cousin from Nagercoil was at home for a couple of days. She was here to get admission into one of the engineering colleges(which claims to be a deemed university).

The 12th std results were out only a couple of days back and there has been a ruling already saying that tamil would be compulsory from the next batch onwards. I immediatley thanked my stars for having been born earlier than the current batch. Phew.....

I learnt tamil on my own because my friends would make fun of me saying I cant read and write tamil. I learnt from "LEARN TAMIL IN 30 DAYS". My dad refused to let me travel by the town bus after that because I was apparently reading gandhipark as gandhipuram and getting into wrong buses!

And this one time ( at band camp;)) okie thatz not funny...sorry) we were travelling by our car and i was testing my tamil reading skills by reading every billboard I could see. In front of us was a lorry which had a message written on it at the back. This was weird. I read it aloud. I didnt understand it. My dad kept saying shut up but i wouldnt stop. Turned out it was an ad advicing men to wear condoms!!!!!

yet another arbit day!

2006-05-23T02:21:00.000+05:30

After two days of marathon movie sessions, just before I could proclaim on my blog that I was self confessed tv junkie, my folks made me run errands the whole day so that I dont laze around at home.

The last two days I watched

* salaam namaste, ddlj, aasai,nandanam(already seen movies)

** gramophone, stolen summer(new movies)

*** desp housewives, lost, sex and the city , charmed( sit coms/serials)

**** and lots of other stuff which I cant seem to remember.

all in one crazy pace. As though I was running out of time.

Just as we returned back from a place where for the first time I saw a thing that is called odyanaum in tamil weighing 1 kilo, fully studded with diamonds. (Supposedly just the making charges is about 6 lakhs!!!what a joke!)okie useless piece of info!

I saw a parcel on our doorstep. It had a coke wrapper on it. I grew suspicious....

It was addressed to my parents name(curioser)!

Dad jumped at it and opened it. The wrapper gave way to a case (nice one at that) that said COCA-COLA- first few sips.

Ah, I had heard that somewhere!!! It was the concept of the induction programme for my summer induction!!!!! damn they are using the same for the mgmt trainee programme too!!!

The case contained 6 cans of diet coke with a letter which welcomed my MUM AND DAD into the folds of the coke family.

But I was happy. Some trace of acknowledgement of me as an employee!!!

My dad promptly took out the cans and appropriated the case saying he was going to use it for the car. I thought until that moment only my mum was obssessed with bags. turns out even my dad was. MY mum collects everything from zip lock bags to jute bags. Everytime we go out , she feels the need for a new handbag!!!!

My neighbour uncle who also happens to be my relative was very curious-why would they spend so much money and send 6 cans of coke to you by courier he asked. Thank God he is not the HR manager at coke I thought to myself!!!

Have started packing my bags for my trip to Gurgaon. Just as I was whizzing past the lanes of Coimbatore today I swore to myself I would never get attached to any place because i was hating the lump that was fast rising in my throat then. I told this to myself even when i left Mumbai.

I guess it's an end of a phase for me.

Now I have got to be all nice and mature...!

Damn!!!!!

random thoughts

2006-05-20T23:19:00.001+05:30

Another couple of weeks and I have to leave home. I know, painful ain't it?
Well, Of course it is the start of a new phase in my life. The one high point is I would be earning.
Was thinking the other maybe even I should give up my career right away and start a book store like i always wanted to!! Seems to be the in thing these days. Maybe I will make create some noise because am sure I will be the first of a kind-one who gave up a career even before it began!!! or maybe not. Am sure someone has done it already!!!
Nothing much to write about today. Was reading the news on the net and reading some famous blogs. These guys sure do get their daily dose of fan mail.
This guy writes like a small paragraph and he gets 42 comments(but of course the guy was talking about the completion of his book) and I write a billion words and I get 3
1) giving me the telephone no. of the local bsnl helpline-WAS BRUTAL. OUCH!
2) someone who really liked my blog but took a printout of it and read it in the loo!!
3) a good friend fromTISS- ah someone still reads my blog.
and ya then there a lot of these cheapskates. The kinds who read my blog and go without a comment, The kinds like Sushant who msg me/call me/text me and have a full length conversation about my thoughts. Thanks Sushant.
There are also the kinds who read my blog and who msg me on yahoo/orkut. Nice blog, keep writing, howlarious. Kichna was generous with his compliments this time around.
I think the most painful moment is when you think you have a point or that you are funny and when the reader actually takes it literally.
I had written a post about how I have never met interesting men ever while on travel unlike what bollywood movies portray. I get this comment from a person
" Dont worry. Try and be yourself. Socializing is not the best method to meet "someone"."
GEE THANKS PAL. I needed that advice! That post promplty disappeared from my blog the following day.
But the killer was this one. I had answered a set of questions which i had been tagged for. Someone wrote"nice questions and ya answers too"
A friend told me I was overanalyzing!! I hope I was!
The worst this time was when someone mailed me with advice about how I should never speak to Govt.officials!!!
Ah the travails of a budding(read vella) blogger.

arrrrrrgggggggggggg!!!!!!!!!!!

2006-05-18T17:36:00.000+05:30

I have been down with fever and a very nasty throat infection. The kind when you are put on an overdose of anti biotics- from the ent doc and the gen.physician. So much so I havent spoken much in the past two days-understatement. I havent done much in the past two days. I hadnt slept the whole of last night and was trying to hoard all of my day's sleep for tonight ButI couldnt help but nod off for a few minutes when I was woken up by my mother saying there was a person on the line regarding the broadband connection problem.

I have been facing a broadband connection probelm. Within few minutes of connection, the line would disconnect. To my dismay I noticed my dad had a monster for a connection-DATAONE!!! It was Government service and I had to reach out to them for my problem. If my friend Arpita would would hear me talking like this she would kill me. She was always in support for the govt. Not that the private players were any good. Nevertheless.

So i got up all groggy, to attend this phone call.

The whole conversation is in tamil...

akila: hello?

##$$:(in a very tamil accent...and high pitch) hallo.... There has been a complaint from you regarding your broadband connection.

akila: yes..(am sorry i made a complaint....will you forgive me??)

##$$: Is it a USB or an ethernet card?

akila: Ethernet

##$$: Okie now switch on the computer.

akila: excuse me...but i have picked up the extension from downstairs and I cant transfer it back, so can i call you?

##$$: what??? how many phones do you have?how come you cant transfer back and....a slurry of other useless questions.

akila:what???! is that like important??

##$$: of course it is, you live in that house and you dont know how many phones you have??
do you atleast know to operate the computer?I am the JE talking here.

akila:(i think to myself...jay...what a nice name for a horrible sounding guy!!)

and answer" i think i do, but just a little bit. "

##$$: okie i will call you back....

so I dutifully go upstairs and wait for his call. 5 mins, 10 mins.No call.

I looked at the watch and realised, it was 5:30. Of course he was not going to call back!!!

So I called dad and got this ##$$'s details and called him back and told him it was the same old me. and He continued the conversation right from where left it.

##$$" so have u atleast switched on your computer?
Akila:yes your highness I have

##$$: What is the modem that you have- the white one or the black one?

Akila: ha...the white one.

##$$: the white one? then it has a maroon bottom
Akila: how techno savvy...yes...the white one with a maroon bottom.

##$$:hmmmm that means it is a MT841?
Akila: yes it is Grandmaster.

##$$: Now right click the icon that connects to broadband.

Usually when some one says right click, i generally presume it is to check the properties but the grandmaster had other plans

##$$: what does it say?
Akila: it says connect, status, cut copy,.......

##$$: okie okie...now connect.
Akila: okie....

##$$: Now after it has connected, open a website- anything, yahoo google, anything

Akila: Thank You kind master for giving me the liberty to open any site.

##$$: see, it works doesnt it?? Thats it. It is very simple.

Akila: Okie, but i have a problem

##$$: you still have a problem???

Akila: crouching in fear...yes i do. The connection gets disconnected after 10- 15 mins.

##$$: on it's own?

Akila: ya rite....i disconnect it on my own and go through this pleasurable conversation with you....

##$$: okie, here is a number. Call up these guys and ask them to find out if there is a problem locally.

Akila: so there is no problem from your side then?
##$$: of course not. It has connected hasnt it? Thats my territory until then. I will not move my freaking butt beyond that.

Akila: Okie.Thanks for being so kind and patient with me. Bye.

So I call up this new number and a lady answers a phone.

Men are okie but ladies in government service are scary. The other day i called up the telephone office for some reason(why do i have to do all the calling i wonder at times) and this lady picks up and i tell her my sms-es are not going to a particular number(selective ignorance;)) and she says ,"oh, is it? okie maybe you should come and meet the Grandmaster personally. Only he can solve your problem"
Akila: oh is there no customer service number i can and they would look into or something?
Lady ##$$" OH i just picked up the phone because it rang. You have to meet the grandmaster personally and find out what is the number"

anyways back to our l'il conversation with the new lady. I repeat all my problems to her and what the grandmaster had told me and goes

" We have customers from tiruppur, ooty, udumalpet...... they have no problems. How come you have?"

Akila: oh damn. I didnt realise it was I who was the sinner!!!!

##$$lady2: okie now , you go call the grandmaster and tell him not to blame me and it is actually his problem with the phone line . My territory ends right here"

the line goes blank....Think she went off to claim overtime for the 5 mins she spent talking to me after 5:30 PM.

I was almost in the verge of tears and went downstairs to rant all this to my mum and complain and savage the government employees and get some self pity for getting shouted at for no reason.

MY mum wouldnt even hear me.

She just said "they are like that. You want to get your job done lady then you got to accept it"

I tried calling my dad to explain what happened I even tried to convince him to get a touchtel connection. He wouldnt even hear me out. He just said" They are like that and we need to accept them"

Of course we do......

This morning I was watching the news about the reservation issues and decided I had to take a stand. What was my opinion? Were reservations necessary?

I saw medha patkasr demonstrating and thought to myself what was my stand?

Having lived amidst social orkers for 2 years it was important i took a stand on things. I was either here or there. If not i was not there!!!!!!!!

But I dont have a bloody stand. I dont. I have just become too tolerant and indifferent to have an opinion. Does it really matter what I think. Ya maybe in a 10-15 min GD for a job interview or something but otherwise it doesnt make a difference what I think.

It is one thing for Madhavan to wax eloquent in RDB about how youth have to change the nation and another thing where we are taught to accept things the way they are......

I studied and made my way through a state which has 69% reservation when the national rule says it should not be over 50%. I studied in a state that is the only state to support the reservation issue openly and wants it to be implemented over and above the 69%!!!!

I dont care a damn actually.

I am just plain indifferent.

at last...!!! graduated

2006-05-06T19:28:00.000+05:30

While i was planning my trip to Mumbai, a friend of mine adviced me to take my parents along with me. I just brushed aside this idea and said no way!!!!!!!! first of all they would melt in the heat. Secondly, my mum and dad hate Mumbai. So why trouble them i thought. But during this sultry hot day, when i received my degree i missed them the most. And my brother too.

Oh btw I have graduated.... THANKS..THANKS...

I am done with my masters in personnel management and industrial relations.

All traditions were broken this year when the Prime Minister Manmohan Singh was invited for the convocation. TISS usually doesnt indulge in such extravagance. When i walked into campus, it resembled deonar police station.

oh i forgot to mention about the dept. lunch we had. Our HOD had hosted a small lunch for us. So i rushed to the hotel directly from the airport. Just before i entered the room i ran through my mind, how my friends would welcome me. I paused for a minute and opened the door...and i was not disappointed. Sangha, Kichu, Ambika, Sandy all hugged me.....missed anu and others...

Went back to campus and by the time i knew it the day was over.

The next day went relatively slow and I was at the height of inactivity when i decided i would kill time by deleting my old mails(ya i was really bored) when sangha(thank god) came and hauled me out to her house. We watched RDB, laughed over insane jokes and took the car and left for the airport to receive her mother.

From the airport aunty was kind enough to drop us at Juhu beach.

I and sangha just sat down and ,.......,yapped......what else we do !!!!!!!!!!

We counted aeroplanes, watched them disappear into the clouds , had behl puri. Felt complete when we walked out of the beach.
WE caught up dinner at a joint nearby and went and sat in MOcha.

Sangs had a four storeyed chocolate cake all by herself and left me awe struck!!!!!!!

We came out and took an auto back tot he airport to pick up anu.
My friend called and told me I sounded very cheerful. I told him that was because i was back in my elements. Back in my favourtite city, Back to doing insane things at insane times!!!!!!!

Picked up and reached sangs place.... and ya we slept at four!!!

Woke up at 6:45 for convo!!!!!!!!!!!! and the usual fun times draping sari....

Left for campus. Campus was polished to the brick(literally)...all the crow shit off crow shit marg had been washed off. Fresh paint and tar greeted us.

We reached the holding area and ya no points for guessing..yapped for a while.

Then we formed the procession queue and waited for The PM to come. We had insane ideas about he would land. The best one was the where sanga said" he would land on top of LH1 and while he walked down, we would scream...man in the hostel. Added to this orange would be his escort.(sorry for the tiss lingo...I am sure tissians are laughing their heads off)

A boring convocation. Highpoint : My friend sangha topped.

While the vote of thanks was being read the most bizarre thing happened. An old student of tiss stood up holding a black flag in protest to PM's decision on Narmada issue and the Bhopal Gas tragedy issue. Some of us were angry. Some irritated. Some indifferent. Some happy- quintessially like TISS!!!!Guess the media got their share of flesh for the day.

On to a nice fare from TAJ, we got back to the convo were the others (apart from the toppers) got their degrees. Yours truly was amongst them. Opened the envelope with trepidation. Our last sem grades were in it. Thankful of what i saw in that sheet, we moved on.

It suddenly struck me- I had graduated. Me, ANANTHALAKSHMI has done her masters too!!!!!

I forgot about my graduation ceremony for my engineering. I think I have a come a long way from there. Wish i could have shared those few moments with appa, amma,anna, rajini vaish,shabeer, sushant, arpita, buddha...the list goes on.....

thank you all......most of all Thank You TISS......

summer time!

2006-05-02T19:42:00.000+05:30

I was on my way back home in the afternoon, which by no means is a pleasurable task with the sun burning down on you. As I entered the lane leading to my house, I noticed a Kwality Walls Salesman on his bright red cycle. The contraption seemed very tech savvy. I saw a small girl contemplating whether she wanted to buy a feast or a simple choco bar(which i love) .For a mere five rupee difference(??) she was racking her brains as to whether she wanted a plain jane vanilla coated with chocolate or a more complicated feast bar with almond fudge!!!

As I passed by, I couldnt but help remember the many a summer time I had spent in Coimbatore. Exams invariably got over by march end or april first week and the books werent touched until june first week. Sometimes I feel I got the best education during these two months. I never really played with dolls as a child. I have very vague memories of having followed my brother around as a very young kid. A few years down the line I was bitten by the reading bug, I devoured the tinkles and amar chitra kathas of the world and graduated soon enough to enid blytons. I have dreamed infinitley(like ever l'il gal who reads enid blyton) of having gangs of friends, meeting up in garages for lemonades. Never really thought of solving mysteries. Even managed to start a gal pal gang in fifth std. We met up at vaishnavi's house. It was a day where we spent talking, watching old videos of vaishnavi doing mohiniattam and of course gorging on usha aunty's food!

All that gave way to a summer of cycling when we were taught to balance one. I vividly remember my cycling trips with then pals sangeetha and sunitha. We went over the whole of colony in our bright and shiny bikes. No motives to burn calories. Just talking and riding the cycle.

Summer in variable brought with it......MANGOES. It has been a part of my life for every summer. Bright shiny, succulent mangoes. When my mum used to sit down to cut them, i would sit like a hawk nearby and grab the pieces right off the knife!!!!(i still do). Mango shakes for all at home was a once in a while affair and hence a much cherished one.

I never really had a native place to go to unlike my other school mates who religiously made trips to their ancestral house. So dad used to make it a point to take us on holidays. We discovered attibelle, thekkady thus with Bhajj uncle and his family. The free breakfast buffets, the fooling around with divya, rakesh and my bro.

Such summers gave way to more grown up(read boring) summers where i used just sleep and watch TV and read books.

Then the ugly thing called board exams raised it's monsterous heads and vacations were no longer nice. We spent time studying for the next year, attending tuitions and so on...

Then came the engineering college holidays(which werent as grand as school...but nevertheless when benchamarked with other colleges our college had considerably more holidays than the rest). I really dont remember doing anything particularly useful during those days. I do remembering studying for CAT during the final yrs of college.

The came my summer holidays with TISS. Oh there were really no holidays in fact as we had to do our summer project.....

But after my graduation from TISS I have 2 months to myself..(1 month down... one more to go) before i join my first job. Feels like olden days and with everyone around me telling i will never get back these days I am on a unsaid mission to well... make use of these days. Use them to relive those parts of my life which i enjoyed the most.-those days when i really moulded myself to be what I am today

Those days which were not spent in hurry to run the race.

Those days which were more simple and definitely more enjoyable.

I reached home, borrowed money from mum(even though my wallet was full), listened to her instructions , took my vehicle back to the ice cream vendor and bought two choco bars- one for me and one for my mum.

STUCK- an evening out in coimbatore

2006-04-25T00:32:00.000+05:30

I sometimes feel I am stuck....
Stuck in a spot....
The world is moving so am I...but I am still in the same place.....
Something like the red queen in alice in wonderland....

I still think I have not changed as a person.... I really havent....Beneath all this nose piercing and hair cuts in an effort to atleast look grown up lies a person who hasnt changed at all. My classmates in tiss made fun of me saying i look like a school kid. So much so that people often gift me stuffed toys(which am not exactly fond of)..because they believe I am kiddish...which i dont think I am.....I often argue on a very silly note with people trying to prove the thin line of difference between child like and childish....

Anyways....now back to my main thought.... I am stuck.... and today I found another companion.... My city was also stuck.....!!!

I live in coimbatore....the city is stuck.....

with a name for which humpteen people give umpteen stories of origin.....that is like umpteen*umpteen...

stuck with it s textile mills which are almost obsolete....

stuck with every aspect that was once a pride......

There was new mallu movie in town and my mum wanted to watch it. So thought will take her for an outing and decided to go for the movie.

For starters the movie timings were the same since i have known what movies were....

We reached the movie hall and i got down from the car and there were guys(am sure from some local engg college like mine) who found me and my mum very amusing.....STUCK....

Stuck with "such guys"

We bought the ticket...and entered the theatre.....the place hadnt changed in years...stuck.....
So much so the deaf ticket collector was still there....stuck....

The same carpets...dirtier of course......
Same wobbly seats.....

Me and mum found a place to sit...... and at sharp 5:45, they ran a short film....like the 500000000000 million times earlier on filaria........

so imagine you go out with junta to have a nice time, plan to watch a movie...and what do u see - a movie on filaria...i was half scared I would get filaria in that hall..!!!!!!!!

The theatre was stuck with the concept of educational movie for the masses....good idea..but dont think it really works...still stuck.........

The movie me taught me intricate details about how to clean filaria ridden feet.....worst case scenarios of filaria( just so that i realise that it IS A SERIOUS DISEASE, if i hadnt in the past 10 mins).....

Then a row of ad films....was almost expecting to see....aarthi aarthi...aarthi...(clap clap)...
okie for non- coimby guys...this used to be the high point of our visit to the cinema hall when we were kids... ad films used to be screened before the movie and at that point there used to be a store called aarthi readymades......and it had a very peppy tune for a jingle...that when it came on the whole theatre would sing....'AARTHI AARTHI AARTHI...CLAP CLAP...SUITING SHIRTINGS READYMADE....DESIGNGAL PUDHU PUDHU VIDHAM,...VANNANGAL..PALA PALA RAGAM,,,, AARTHI AARTHI aarthi ...CLAP CLAP"(PHEW;))

but thankfully it was the turn of some other store.....

Then came the movie (very unceremoniously when compared to the ads).....

My mum was all super thrilled because the movie was supposedly shot near her native place in kerala..... (read my earlier blog entries to know how my mum is stuck in a fanatasy mallu land)

It was a mohanlal starrer(i love that guy)......really nice movie,,......but remember the city is stuck.....the current got cut....like good old times..... and like good old times...the hooligans started barking...... the movie resumed and unceremoniously again the movie got cut again....this time for an intermission....no mention...no slides...nothing....ON YOUR FACE!!!

I made a quick call to dad and told him it wasthe break....and my dad very much like his old self asked when the movie would get over(he has hardly seen movies in theatres....the last time he did...he entered in the intermission and was blissfully asleep in 10 mins)....the movie resumed and no points for guessing....unceremoniously....lest anyone buying popcorn, attending to natures call would know it has started !!

awesome movie....me and mum enjoyed it....

It got over...and I and mum walked out...dad was waiting to pick us up...(he was there in a jiffy....that is because of my theory that any place in coimbatore can be reached in 15 mins from any place!)

Me and dad decided to take mum out for dinner and chose...again no points for guessing ...ANNA POORNA....

ask anybody about coimbatore and they will mention three things....
ooty, textiles and annapoorna vadai sambhar!!!!!!!!

we decided to try their north indian cuisine....( coimby guys.....bear with me...i mean cuisine et al....)))
My dad remarked about how his Lion s club meetings used to be held in a small hall next to the restaurant.The place has remained the same as far as i can remember....

my mum and dad very cutely and quintessentially ordered sweet corn soup and cream of tomato soup.....

and we ordered this dish called gobi manchurian....

Okie...now everyone has to know about this gobi manchurian.....everyone in south india/coimby loves gobi manchurian.....
it is neither a chinese dish nor north indian....but any party...any get together...any marriage SHOULD have gobi manchurian..!!!!!!!!!!!! and the hotels across coimby dish it out in various manners and annapoorna makes it in the best possible manner........my mum has even asked in earlier occasions to the waiter...the secret 7X formula behind it.......

and i ordered vegetable do pyasa and the waiter looked at me with a "what the hell was that lady" kind of look....

apparently though it is mentioned in the menu they dont know about it.....so what is available is(no points for guessing again).... malai kofta.... panneer butter masala.....kadai panner/veg...mushroom fry.....STUCK STUCK STUCK!!!

we ordered some naans and kadai veg. and of course GOBI MANCHURIAN....

pop and mum wahed all this down with a glass of horlicks....

Now everyone in coimby/south india in general have a horlicks fetish!!!

I am not even stepping into the coffee area(kaapi....) but horlicks is a must for people who are sick...so when i was young...and having watched horlicks being used in every movie/ real life situation where a person has been admitted to a hospital... (its there...on the side table...near the patient...always....like superman on seinfeld's shelf).... I asked an uncle of mine who was doctor the reason behind the panacea for all illness-HORLICKSSSSSS
he explained to me that the first questions families of patients generally ask him wrt diet of the patient is " can we give him horlicks?" STUCK.....

he went on to say that in fact horlicks is avoidable because it is so heavily malted that patients can sometimes puke because of the malt!!!!!!!!! but no... WE ARE STUCK WITH HORLICKS....AND YA GOBI MANCHURIAN!!!!!!!!!

we took a quite drive back home, the end of an evening out in in coimby at 9:30....the city is almost asleep...!

....I observed...a CCD, a barista on the way back.... hip youngsters hanging out for cuppa.... hmmmm at least somethings have changed..... (or so i think)

I almost felt like being part of the coimbatore algorithm. A perfectly well oiled machine....which churns out millions of protoypes... upgraded every once in a while

.....same school for 14 yrs.... 4 yrs of engg just like every other kovai sarala, kamala, vimala.....

slipped into an mba somewhere (and damned because of that by many a..... not a software engineer after all and not onsite and ya not married!!!!).....

My brother was a step ahead in the code.... he was among the NRIs in my colony just like the guy in the opp house, next door, diagonally opp house, back side house.... and in the colny next to ours.....
like any other kovai mani,pani, shani.....

But behind all this contorted view of coimbatore is a place which is a lovely city(??) to grow up in.... some lovely people....the best climate, the best tasting water.....

No wonder I am stuck....like my city is....the place where i grew up....like the junta around me.....and just like everyone around me I contribute to this program- by being stuck to the same place ...in order to move on.......

no wonder am adorable (:P) in a weird way.....just like coimby is......

2006-04-22T23:45:00.000+05:30

I am back after a small soujourn....

well atleast if i use some words like these I can feel like I have gone on some holiday.

Havent been doing anything useful. Just been myself...

Was watching the grand finale of Indian Idol....The first time i saw an episode was when i was sitting in the studio of Indian idol....so thought might end it in style as well...and hence saw the finals....

While sitting in the studio...I was really impressed by this contestant called Karunya...he sang really well and made all others in the contest sound like kids.
I was almost sure he would win the title...

But today he didnt...another guy called sandeep acharya won...sandeep who sang like a mediocre participant.....

Am sure everyone who voted for sandeep knew that he wasnt the best singer.....

Am sure every soul that saw indian idol knew that karunya deserved to be indian idol....

But he didnt win....and the most loud and obvious reason that came was that he was a south indian....Logically not many south indians watch the programme and hence he lacked the votes...
in spite of this he had made it to the final two....

Now i care little for who is indian idol....neither do i care much if the guy who wins the title is from timbaktu.......

And these thoughts of mine go beyond this silly competition.....

I just couldnt help wonder while everyone waxes eloquent how literacy is the key to bondage of the masses, I felt and not for the first time that, the more educated we are, the more we tie ourselves up.... In shackles which only serves to separate us....

I cried once in tiss,.... to arpita my room mate....

I was astounded at how educated people like us...the so called educated class chose to indulge in behaviour which was akin to people in the krita yuga....

I have been parochial....but you know in a silly way......But I have never let anyone's region of region form the basis of my opinion about him/her.......and i dont think i ever will....

Am sure we all have thoughts that border on these... even our politcal system is structured on this.......

am sure everyday we live with so many things structured around us that we cant break out of it....

and am sure with so many reasons around to fetter us we are comfortable enough not to break them......

as though agreeing to my thoughts MS subba lakshmi sings in the background

"ANTHA NAALUM VANTHU IDA DHO".....(I WISH THOSE DAYS COME")

Gees...i almost feel like an angry 4 yr old who cant find the right words....But i think I feel much better....

DISCLAIMER: for all those souls who are wandering vella......for those who read my blog and make it a point to call me and tell me itz bad....dont bother this time around!!!

kaviya velli;)!

2006-04-07T17:56:00.000+05:30

okie for all thos wondering what the hell does my title mean.....let me give you a brief background....
I was completely vellllllaaa......so after lunch as usual while i was flicking the tv remote and irritating my dad a the same time...I happened to chance over this movie called KAVIYA THALAIVI....now i will not be a movie critic and tell you all about the movie....but it is supposed to be a tamil classic....so i refused to put it on.....
after my dad left for the office....i put the channel back on and watched the whole movie from title to credits:)!

so that is the title for the day" historical friday".......btw it was a nice movie....typically balachander...

and gemini ganesh who i loathe and call sambhar actually did a good job.....

hmmmmmm now to go on about my vellllaness.....I chanced upon this questionnaire in vivek's blog.....

now now....i will not pretend that I am being forced to fill it...nobody tagged it....i just willingly ctrl-c ctrl V-ed it......:)

Were you named after anyone?

#### yes my grandmother...who was named after hers...who was named after hers....so on...u get it right?? but my granddaughter will be named akila....;)!

2. Do you wish on stars?

#### I leave that shahrukh and kajol.....actually going to think of it I do!!!!!!
so the logical conclusion should be I am kajol!!!!!!!!!!

3. When did you last cry?

#### Thatz quite easy.....i exercise my tear gland very often......last was on my bday when my dad forgot my bday!!!!!!!!

4. Do you like your handwriting?

####of course i do...even RC Dutta told me it was good....now going to think of i am not sure if he was being sarcastic as the notes that he saw was abt HLL.....(sorry for the pvt joke but tissians will understand)

5. What is your favourite meat?

####hmmmmmmm....should i say chicken....or should i say mutton...oh am a veggie btw....(most ppl would think the above line is for the sake of being funny....(arpita in case ur reading) ....but itz actually because I am vella....

What is your most embarrassing CD on your shelf?

#### hmmmmm cdz.... nah no embarrassing cdz...but tapes...yes a boyzone tape.....ya.ya we all commit mistakes....I even liked the gay guy in the band...steve!!!1

7. If you were another person, would YOU be friends with you?

####If i were a gal......NO.....

if i were a guy........... itz a no brainer....NO!!!!!!!!!!(reallly.....i am extremely moody....)

8.Are you a daredevil?

#### well...no... but i can parasail.....but cant do a roller coaster(tried it once)

9. How do you release anger?

Well...I attach a bucket through a tube which goes into my left year and then start shouting RELEASE....RELEASE.......

OR i remember my 7th std yoga teacher and sing RELAXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

10. Where is your second home?

It used to be Mumbai.....now i have none...I have just one...

11. Do you trust others easily?

NO i dont....neither do i trust myself so easily....but i trust myself to put my foot into my mouth anytime...!!!!!

12. What was your favourite toy as a child?

It's weird but true...i never played with toys.....

13. What class in school/college do you think is totally useless?

I thought school was enriching....after school i had four hazy years...i dont remember what i did.....those four years of my life i think are the most ^&*^*%&$%^$%#$#^^*& days...so the answer is pretty much what i did in those four years...it-that must-not-be-named....

14. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

I try.....

15. Have you ever been in a mosh pit?

#### I think the whole idea of sex-drugs and rock and roll sucks... and the mosh pit is an embodiment of the same.....

16. What do you look for in a girl?

#### I think this questionnaire was quintessially like a lot of other things designed with guys in mind:)! but still...like a lot of other things i treat this question like UNISEX....

I like smart gals....independent ones.....with no obbssessive compuslive disorder of affiliation motives.... who like to have their space....

17. Would you bungee jump?
Mebbe yes....
18. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?

thatz a nice question...I just observed this habit of mine yesterday.....I dont.....am so lazy i dont....so lazy that i walk around with my floater without putting the flap on!!!!!!so that it's easy to remove

19. What's your favourite ice cream?

#### chocolate...

20. What are your favourite colours?

#####black.....

21. What are your least favourite things?

#### hmmm public toilets.... liars, hypocrites, ppl with a lot of affiliation motives..... basically all corporates;):)!and no i didnt mean that statement!!!!!!!!!!!

22. How many people do you have a crush on right now?

#### none....likus singulus.....but otherwise.....josh hartnett....joan baez.... the doc on LOST, (i know....!!!!!!!!!!) RAJINI..KANTH....(I just saw dhalapathy....what a movie......rajini rocks...)

23. Who do you miss most right now?

will change that to a what..... I miss pasta...I have been craving for pasta..... some creamy pasta.....!!!!!!!! and ya i miss anu....spent ayear with that gal and look what shez making me do.....i am watching SUN MUSICCCCCCCCCCC!!!!!!!!scary!!!!

24. What are you listening to right now?

#### a whole lot of joan baez and dylan.... and some bruce springsteen....

25. If you were a crayon, what colour would you be?

#### I wouldnt want to be a crayon.....but if i am one i will be only a wax crayon....maybe orange..../black....

26. What is the weather like right now?

#### itz nice....:)

27. Last person you talked to on the phone?

#### dad....told him i watched kaviya thalaivi!!!!!!!!!!!

28. The "first" thing you notice about the opposite sex?

####Thank God for this UNISEX question..... I dont know....

All that i know is the manz got be funny and intelligent.... no brains...no gains;)!

29. Do you like the person who sent you this?

Considering i got it myself.....of course i love myself;)!

30. How are you today?

#### Velllla.....

31. Favourite non alcoholic drink?

#### loads of stuff....Chocolate Milk Shake, dubey dughdhalay butter milk.....mango juice....orange juice....real juice...

32. Favourite alcoholic drink?

#### Like Jai says...I will not drink alcohol until it tastes like orange juice!!!!

33. Natural hair colour?

wish russell peters heard this question.......... helloooooooooo we are indian...we have only black or brown....or maybe grey....! RP rocks....

34. Eye colour?

Black....wish i had hazel..... then i could have auditioned for ANGEL as a demon without make up!!!

35. Wear contacts?

####NOpes....

36. Siblings?

#### yep....one big brother.........

37. Favourite month?

#### march, april may.....

38. Favourite food?

okie boring question with 2 long an answer...

39. Favourite day of the year?

when my summer holidays begin...and i realise i have 2 whole months ahead me....with nothing to dooooooooooo!!and this year it was march 23rd....but DAMNno more summer hoildays after this one...

40. Have you ever been too shy to ask someone out?

#### Ask some1?? I have never asked anyone out:))okie dont get to my throat thinking I am the quintessial female who has to be asked out..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

41. Scary movies or happy endings?

#### Neither...sucker for movies with a roman holiday kind of endings.....!

42. Summer or winter?

####Summer.

43. Holi or Diwali?

#### both rock....had a bucket, mud pit loads of fun playing holi this year!

44. Do you like your name?

#### are u kidding me...with a 14 letter long name.....nobody will!!!!!!!!!!! I love akila.....!!!!!!But i Thank God my parents didnt give me a name that was UNISEX!!!!! (hahaha hope ur reading this 1)

sorry abt the pvt joke,,,... but hell its my blog !!!!!!
45. What book/magazine are you reading?

#### gerald durrell...my family and other animals...apart from the HINDU

46. What's on your mouse pad?

THE MOUSE!!!!!!!!!DUH raised to infinity

47. What did you watch on TV last night?

##### 8 SIMPLE RULES OF DATING MY TEENAGE DAUGHTER... last episode of this season...!!:(((((

48. Favourite Smell?

#### the smell of money...currency notes;)! apart from petrol, kerosene....

49. Have you ever regretted breaking up with someone?

Of course we all do....the very next minute!!!!!!!!!!!

50. Most tiresome thing you’ve ever experienced/done?

##### i would have wanted to say filling up this questionnaire....but i have done lots of other tiring stuff which cant in any remote alternate world be compared to this self afflicted action of mine....!!!!!!!!!!!!!

my beauty...

2006-04-04T14:12:00.000+05:30

I am velllllaaaaaaaaaa(got it right , buddy?) okie okie....my friend writes ,.,....

"the term is 'vella' and not 'vela'...wots in a freaking 'l' u ask?well a lot apparently, as was disclosed to me by my dear north indianfriend(parts deleted to protect identity)u cud normally say 'vela' in a straight flow... but tat is just sooooowrong... u shud say 'velllla' ensuring the tongue touching the upperpalate while enunciating the "l" sound.... it helps embody thecomplete lack of anythin else useful to do in tat time of enunciation:P so u see... how important it is??? :P :))))"

so decided to help my folks with my brother's wedding preparations. Assumed the role of the wedding planner, gave myself enough publicity even before i made an effort to do iota of work for them.

My mum suddenly decided to go saree shopping

shopping??? what..???!shopping???

....I love shopping....of course...i love shopping....who doesnt....???!;)!

There was a sale running (10% off on anything that you pick).....The shop that we chose belongs to a friend of ours and is a very traditional shop run by very modern people. The owner of the store came in sporting a satya paul saree.....and ushered us in.....after all the OH CONGRATULATIONS...!!!!!!!!! IS THIS YOUR DAUGHTER??? OHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHHH EHHHHHHHHHHH KHAWUIRY785638YIFHM4I7T6348T73976

We flopped ourselves on the floor to take a look at the sarees........

And for those two hours...I enjoyed myself....but couldnt help remembering tom hanks in You've got mail.....

Short decaf cap," "Tall mocha latte." "Grande lowfat regular.

oh man...the choices we have to make.....burgundy, brown, oh no no black....white....make it off white......yellow...golden brown, peacock blue..!!!!!!!!!!

kanchipuram.....pure kanchipuram.....cotton silk....silk cotton(yep there s a difference)...crepe, chiffon...,

and then they showed me the beauty...........I fell in love with her,......and and like all beauties she was out of reach!!!!!!!
I got the shocker when i saw her price tag.......bid her adieu...wished her well...hated the person who would love her and take her home after me.....held her in my arms...refused to let her go....!!

looking at my lunacy...my mum relented....!!!!!!!!!!!hooorah....!!!!

she is a peachish orangish- whateverish kanchivaram....with a wine red jari.....rich...classy....elegant......my beauty....!!!

for all those who wnat to see her....be there....august 31st....seshadri manadapam....coimbatore...

money for nothing??

2006-03-26T15:14:00.000+05:30

Have you ever heard of a proposition where you pay money and get yourself tortured in return...?? well not in all cases but in most cases....

If you havent, then welcome to the girl's world of beauty salons....now even the man's...

As a teenager I used to going to the salon like plague. My mum was tired of goading me to make a trip....No way....

Apart from the once-in-a- while haircuts, I refused to go to the salon. But such are nature s ways that I did have to start making those trips once in a while....

Sometimes I wonder, what sort of a genius must have been the person(s) who started this whole concept of salons.....In the same breath I also think it must have been one grave accident which gave the person this bright spark of idea.....

coming to think of it how else can one explain the whole grand idea of pouring hot wax on oneself and ripping it off with plastic...!!!!!!!!

Men....you complain about removing bandaids from hand....Imagine this....

Shouldnt we also blame the evolution of thinking which left people thinking that body hair on men is macho while on women it is disgusting!!!!!!!!

Going to think of it, its just the human mind which is the basis of everything.....

economy is based on the human wants and behaviour, supported by cognitive psychology which believes that there aint no such as the environment...its all in the head....

okie enough digression.....back to hot wax.....

if that isnt painful enough you can choose to have a thread rolled over your face, like ants biting at a continous rate....Then you can also try to get your nose stabbed with a thin steel rod, have ammonia smelling bleach applied all over your face, a contraption running over your face trying to remove those harmless but ugly worts. If all this is not enough you can go down the path of paying through your nose to have a chemical applied all over your hair which would make your hair(or rather whatever hair is left after the chemical has been washed off) straight......

My friend went in for this process and had tears in her eyes when she was promptly handed over a huge clump of hair to save for posterity...Now her hair looks like a 80's film stars hair do(the one where they used buns for the heightened look)....

Another friend of mine was called in for a complimentary change of hair color programme and they turned her hair blonde..... Ashwathi monroe....what a personality....!!!!!

But of course not all of it is bad, the pedicures can create miracles to ones feet...They can convert cracked feet looking like a topography map of africa to a aerial view of the pyrenees......Also the hair washes can be relaxing , but i can do all those myself....!!!!!!

Adding to all this , it comes with the additional benefit of highly trained/skilled personnel who can make you look excited for weeks to come with just one wrong move of a thread over your eye brows.

They also offer microdermaabrasions(God save my skin), skin polishing etc etc.....

Dandruff trouble??? not to worry.....they will run a contraption that will give slight shocks if your hair is oily or too frizzy and also kill the dandruff......

Everytime I get my upperlips waxed i ask the gal.."is there no way i can do away with this forever?" for am not lucky like a few good souls have no trace of hair on face, hands and legs.....

Maybe i should just get myself laser-ed....i would have ...if only i could afford it.....Rs 10,000 can get you hair free hands thanks to laser.... Rs1500*3 sittings for upperlip....
all the hair is gone...FOREVER!!!!

If all this aint enough for you, salons also offer to pierce body parts.... how interesting is that.....

Earlier we could afford to wear just normal clothes to salons. Now,the lady who waxes my hand wears better clothes than i do.....

And everytime my hairdresser cuts my hair he goes "tch...tch....dandruff".

....hello am just human!!!!!!!!!! let us see your hair for split ends, greys....how nice would that be.....

so added to the pain I also get humiliated.....

But as Dylan said The times they are a changing(wrong situation but nevertheless love quoting Dylan) Now i cant stop fussing over the lenght of my eye brows, the right shape, the curves etc etc....

And at the end of a session when i am left a few hundred notes dearer, I look at myself.....devoid of body hair, a body piercing, silky smooth hair....a glance to the mirror i reassure myself--money well spent

....it is all worth it for that one second of satisfaction you get when you look at yourself....

As a friend said....."tough being us" ...isnt it...???

bid farewell to a magical city...and some magical times

2006-03-23T11:39:00.000+05:30

I was sitting in my desk...listening to Josh Groban's version of Starry starry nights..... writing my strategy assignment.....

I suddenly felt a lump in my throat......tears trickled down ....dropped heavy on the mintzberg classic that i was holding........

end of some magical times here at tiss, i thought to myself....

I am running away home today with no time to even realise...it s all over.....

my tears rolled down steady.....i chose to let them.....i chose to let that feeling sink in....
i chose to drown myself in that one moment of undescribable emotion......

the people i met, the good times i shared, the not so happy times flashed past.....i felt like some movie where all this was running in slow motion in the back ground......

i felt myself sink deeper into that quirky feeling.....

I got to know myself.....spent time with myself..... here in this place.....

and here i was leaving this place which was my home for close to two years.....

I met some magical people in the course of these 2 years.....some i lost.......

and yet another cliched line of how am going to carry a piece of everything experienced these two years with me....wherever i go.....

Starry, starry night
Paint your palette blue and grey'
Look out on a summer's day
With eyes that know the darkness in my soul
Shadows on the hills
Sketch the trees and daffodils
Catch the breeze and the winter chills
In colours on the snowy linen land

GOODBYE MUMBAI....good bye tiss....

bye to all the lovely times....

Indian Idol!

2006-03-11T10:09:00.000+05:30

Have been in Mumbai for the past two years. In this time span I have had a variety of experiences....ranging from falling off running trains in Bandra station to wading through knee deep water to witnessing gigantic human pyramids.......

But I never even thought i would be party to an event which defines Mumbai- the tinsel town....
ya thats right- a tv show shoot!!!!

I have seen shootings before in Mumbai, just one of those passing by shoots which happened to happen in front of my fieldwork office, which happened to have naseeruddin shah, who happened to look delicious in his salt and pepper+ and cargo pants look. I am digressing from the main topic or rather getting distracted;)!

SCENE 1:

Well, this was, i should say freak of an incident. I had already made plans of watching syriana with a friend when my cousin priya(who is as crazy is as me) called up and asked me

" hey akki....where the hell are you??(thatz the eternal question all my local guardians ask me the minute they pick up the phone)

after all the niceties etc, priya asked me if I wanted to accompany her to see the shooting of Indian idol. She had a couple of passes for the shooting(thanks to some phone in radio show) and wanted to know if i was game,.........

hmmmmm indian idol vs. Syriana

One was a show which i hardly followed, while the other one was a political thriller, a movie i had been waiting for, and well, had george clooney in it...do i need any other reason to even think twice.....Syriana I thought....

Suddenly there was a thought triggerred in my brain. "I am going to be in Mumbai for hardly another 10-15 days,...and where the hell am i going to see a shooting again???"

so making a mental note to say sorry to clooney and then to sushant with whom i was supposed to watch the movie with, I agreed to go with priya!!!!!!!

We agreed to meet outside pheonix mills the next day.

SCENE 2:

Me outside phoenix mi(a)lls:.....had missed breakfast, had caught the bus just in time to reach the mall...was famished.....

Priya,the loving gal that she is,had packed aloo parathas for me(wah.....made another mental note to be as nice as she is when i become a mum)! We found out way to kamala studio and said "phew, here we are at last...now some entertainment"!

We joined the bee line to get in.....I was pretty surprised that the whole set up was pretty well organized. We were taken into another waiting area. There was water passed around for all of us. We waited for an hour before they opened the door. But in this one hour, it was pretty good fun to observe people.

The first thing that i noticed was : I and priya were blushing!!!

the second thing that i noticed was : everyone who walked in after us was also blushing....

third thing: there were people who were as vela(vetti, job-less) as I and priya were !!!!

think they were also shooting virgins;)!

Both of us were startled to know that they even served lunch for all of us: roti, dal, sabji and rice and it tasted pretty good too(i just tasted a morsel from priya's plate)

After about 45 minutes, they let the extras in...these are the guys who get paid for being in the audience!!! what a nice way to earn some pocket money huh!!!

finally after almost 1.5 hours they let us into the main shooting area. God, decently dressed uncles and aunties surprised us by rushing to get the centre seats!!!! I also met a lady (who i think does no work apart from visiting shootings) who knew how everything worked. She had come in with her sons(who also dont go to school and accompany their mother everywhere;)!) and a neighbour(i assume;))!
She said that for a half hour serial with dialogues it takes four hours to shoot...when i heard that i started regretting my decision!!!!

Me and priya got a decent view from were we were.....We were passed on some placards and photographs of participants. Both of us completely avoided that and even coaxed people sitting next to us to not get it so that the camera does not loom anywhere near us.

One of the organizers went on stage and asked audience to hold up its placards for each participant and cheer and this was recorded......

After all the tamasha....the hosts mini mathur and aman varma walked in with the least of fanfare...

Then came the judges-- anu malik, sonu nigam and farah khan and special judge Dia Mirza...

Being the cynics that both of us are ...we were quite sure that the whole show was rigged. But were pleasantly surprised to know that the whole thing was almost seamless except for a few breaks.....

The participants were mediocre except for one guy, who was too good!!!

To our delight/discomfort, this was a special show where all the participants sang two songs...

The crowd was divided into halves: the ones who were sitting behind the judges and the ones in front of the judges....
the ones in front of the judges did all the hard work....they had to stand up everytime the singers came near by. Sit at the cue of the directors, have fun when the directors asked them to........

I bet if anu was there she would have dragged me to the front area!!!!

Before the show started I asked Priya..." priya I want these boards which say applause....silence, awwwwwwwwwwww.... for me to emote"!!!! priya just silently pointed to an electronic board nearby which blinked applause every time we had to behave like the audience!!!!

I mean just applause???.....just plain calpping of hands???,......is that all that was required of me????!

anyways....the show got over pretty quick, but they had forgotten to shoot Dia Mirza's entry scene....and this being the holi episode, there was the chewed and flogged to death idea of men with dhols to accompany dia's grand entry. Just when i thought that, the dhols went off and the men started dancing with such amazing grace, i couldnt help but sympathize why the directors fall prey to this idea time and again!!!!

There were some technical snags and the shoot was getting delayed. Audience started getting impatient and there was this husband and wife who started shouting at the organizers. I had been noticing them. They had come with friends of theirs(couples again)...

Suddenly this lady got angry and dragged her husband till the exit point and started fighting with the organizers.....she reasoned that she had a kid and so did the other woman and she was getting worried about the kids and the husband said that "Mera kudh ka dhandha hai...Indian idol mera kaam nahin hai...aapne bola 3:30 aur ab che bajh gaye hain...hamey jaana hai!!"......

I found it extremely funny. here was this guy who had left his Dhandha to come and watch a stupid shooting of Indian idol with his friends and didnt have a problem till the minute the show was officially over and he couldnt wait because his kid was waiting...???! the shoot was already delayed by almost 3 hours (although we were not told any timing, we just assumed 12-3) and suddenly he realised his kid was alone????????!!!!!!

and the uncle in question a few paragraphs back, was suddenly impatient to go home....and started enquiring" all the judges have gone....all the participants have gone...why should i stay back?"....I thought to myself "you fool....at 12... when none of the judges were there....none of the participants had arrived why did you arrive "

The crew members were really nice and thanked the audience....Me and priya found our way out. abandoned our shopping plans and just decided to go home......

When we got back home, priya and me had dinner and she dozed off immediately on the couch. On being questioned by uncle(priya's dad) i said " oh uncle, me and priya are very tired" and he looked at me quizzically and said" what did you guys do...just sit and watch right???"!!!!!!!

Well that brought us to the end of an interesting day, I did one other thing that was not in my list of things to do before i left mumbai...(btw i have progressed quite a distance in that list)!!!!

Will miss my arbit life in Mumbai!
Good night and Goodluck!!!!!!!

Btw the show happens on sony Tv on monday evening at 9:00 plz...watch...and vote for K-A-R-U-N-Y-A to 2525.....

AND YA WHEN YOU HEAR THOSE CLAPS, YOU KNOW WHO WAS THERE DOING SUCH AN AWESOME JOB!!!!!!!!!!!

had to post this one

2006-03-11T10:02:00.000+05:30

Was in the process downloading a Joan Baez mp3 when i stumbled upon this error message:

kinda found it weird!!

Unethical content browsing service is available from 11:00 P.M. to 06:00 A.M.(IST).As per Current Policy laid by NOFRA Implementation Committee it prevents your request from being allowed at this time

NOFRA: NAVAL OFFICERS RESIDENCE AREA.....

one of those days

2006-02-28T21:17:00.001+05:30

Its one of those days

when I completely hate the human race

when i completely hate the human race an ounce more than my last statement......

when I am not trying to do a oh-so-cute blog coz i just dont feel like it....

Dont you think the human beings are weird....Sometimes you cant do without them and sometimes you just dont want to be anywhere near them......

one of those days when my creative juices aint flowing thanx to the rotten human being(s)

One of those days i feel obstinate....

one of those days when i blog when i have a research thesis submission the next day....

one of those days when two people in a row thought i was trying to be funny with my blog( last straw that broke my heart)

one of those days when i am searching for music to soothe my brain and cant find anything that sounds just rite...........

one of those days when you feel the whole world has ganged up against you

one of those days when you feel that paulo coelho kinda thing...the whole universe conspiring against you.....thats rite conspiring against me......

one of those days which you think should pass soon and good things happen to you immediately.....

one of those days when i crib too much......

I think Rudyard kipling must have felt like this when he wrote :

If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you.......
with(out) his permission i change it to

If only neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you

things 2 do b4 i leave Mumbai!

2006-02-24T22:53:00.000+05:30

Things to do before I leave Mumbai……

Pack my books and send them home….(how uninteresting)
Shop for down rightly cheap skirts and tops
Do a night out in marine drive
Do another night out at band stand
Do yet another night out in town area
Get someone to buy me breakfast at taj lands end…(koachie…….)
Do every Sunday morning breakfast at le café….(hmmm all the muffins, toast…yummmm juice)
Eat as much pani puri as I can…(oh ya jhama sweets too and drink dubey dughdalaya buttermilk…!!!!)
Make noise in the hostel in the no noise time….
Jam sessions with sanju, shiva to irritate every1….
Night time chai….no sutta !!
Tell my hostel warden that hostel meetings are the biggest waste of time on earth…
Go to my local guardians house and tell them am alive and kicking and leaving
Keep up my promise of going to cravings in ghatkopar
Say no to a eunuch when he/she asks me money….(am shit scared of them)
Get back to reading the books I have left half way( gerald durrel is funny…)
Get up everyday at 6:30 ….not going to waste my last few days in mumbai sleeping….
Irritate all my social work friends by doing all this!!!!

go goa!

2006-02-24T00:53:00.000+05:30

Been wanting to write this for a long time... dint shape up too well...!!! but herez to our goa trip! Go GOA!!!!!!!!!!will upload the pics with the blog sometime soon.....
GO GOA:

It was a lazy Sunday morning when Anu and me were taking a walk to the shop peeche.

All of a sudden anu started budgeting for our forever-in-the-pipeline Goa trip. The beaches, sand, the paragliding…all the fun…..how many times me and anu had had this conversation. I was sick. We needed to do something. We decided to just go. We went to the girls hostel only to be greeted by maddy. I said “ want to go to goa?”. She was blown away…Goa..(In the typical maddy way) I think it didn’t strike her till we actually boarded the bus…!!!!

The next victim was Vini who threw a small tantrum saying she wanted to get her parents permission( hmmmmmm…..). Then anu sent an sms to adi(the charming guy of our class according to sarla rao) which went like” planning a trip to goa…plz say yes” and we got an equally smart reply---”yes”….how much we cheered. Adi joined us shortly reasoning that he wanted to come to Goa was because it was in his KRA s for the fourth sem. The next round of sms-es went to Vinay and gang. We roped in Sandy who tried to resist by giving reasons like research…but we got the better of her. So off we went to book tickets.

When we returned , Anu suddenly realized that the two day trip we had planned would be too short. But I had my Rem Mgmt ppt on Monday….devil and the deep sea…(quite literally…tissians would know what I meanJ) Finally we decided to just have max fun in 2 days at Goa. We counted days till 26th jan. We prepared like never before, dresses to wear, sunglasses, moisturizer, bags, money…the endless list….

But unfortunately vini had to drop out…we missed you vini….

So the jing bang of AKILA, ANU, MADDY, SANDY, DIVI, SANGHA, VINAY, HEMANT, ADI, ANIKET set out for GOA!

We waited eagerly…hmmmmm actually just whiled away our time till the day arrived;)!
Boarded the Volvo and reached panjim.

Anu naturally glided into the troop leader’s role thanks to her innumerable visits to Goa. While she went to get some bikes(yes we rode all over goa in bikes) me, maddy, sandy, divi, sangha waited for them in the bus stop. And of course we had the women’s man hemant to give us company. We picked up the bikes and off we went to Calangute. Did I mention we had no place in mind to stay…we just followed the road and our hearts….

Once in Calangute we luckily got a nice resort to stay in. We quickly changed into our beach wear;)(esp sandy). Sandy showcased a completely different side of her personality in Goa. Sandy is a very classy person who doesn’t indulge in juvenile acts(like many of us) and dresses to the same taste. But that day sandy turned pinky with her pink scarf and wait….best of all…..pink bangles….But she remained sexy as ever!!!! And she didn’t stop with that…she roped in maddy for her hunt for a sarong…so me and anu took the wise route…We ditched them!!!!!!!!
We found this really nice breakfast place….had brunch and set out for the calangute beach…..Now now where r the guys we suddenly thought…..they had taken the easy way out and gone to the beach on their own….(never mind !)

Had a rollicking time in the beach…hemant did his Baywatch moves in the water with his glasses and floaters on, anu refused to get out of the water except for once to have a breezer, sandy was too busy taking snaps, sangha gave anu company, divi in the water with her cap and full sleeve on lest she lose her hair and complexion!!! adi aniket vinay maddy played Frisbee and where was i…??! I was lost……lost in my thoughts, in knee deep water, thoroughly enjoying myself, shrieking like I had lost my marbles, having fun like no one else was watching…..went on the water scooter(refer previous entries;))!

It was around 2:30 we realized we had spent half a day doing almost nothing…so we decided to get back , get dressed and explore Goa….I couldn’t wait to get onto the ACTIVAS we had rented…so off we went….

We reached Baga and took a de tour to Vagator and by the time we reached the DCH fort , it was too late….so we ditched the attempt and went back to baga beach……

In baga I tasted my full fledged alcohol laced drink- breezer!!!:)) I know….i know…breezer aint alcohol, you need 16 breezers to get high….but whos bothered….

We went to brittos for dinner…..some awesome Italian food, stomachz full, hearts contented with the day we decided to head back…..

While the guys got up next morning and claimed to have gone jogging….we woke up just in time to make full use of our last day in Goa…we decided to head towards the DCH fort again….i was already scared….i hate anything that is even remotely inclined, slightly slippery but nevertheless……the ride was awesome….maddy and me were biking partners…adi tried to take as many pictures as possible with his mean biker look but he dint look remotely mean from any angle I looked at!!! Maddy and me got lost and when we got back on track we saw our very own angels adi and hemant waiting at the turn for us…..and the ingrates we were, we zoomed by waving a bye to them…..adi later remarked “ the gals looked so happy getting lost!!” reached the fort…a small trek and the fort was there in all its….ahem…..okie ….glory….

Well when I saw the shot of the fort in the movie Dil Chahta Hai… I was blown….actually am just exaggerating…It looked good…. But in real it wasn’t so gr8….we met these two guys who were selling cool drinks in the fort, overpriced cool drinks I should say….we took walks along the fort…I stayed on the ground while rest of them walked on the wall…..( I am such a coward….but blimey on a rickety wall for thrills…..no I’d rather stay on ground!!!!) saw some downright cheap guys who lived up to their reputation, reminded me of my KCT days( my engg college) ….Hemant and divi were on their own trip making portfolios of themselves by taking turns posing for the photographs…While the whole crowd opted to climb down the hill to the beach me and maddy chose to drive down….!!!! So we went back, picked up the vehicle to meet the crowd at vagator beach…..On the way maddy caught up some awesome breakfast at this place called the mango tree which had a huge flat screen and played movies every night!
While maddy ate her beans and toast I did a bit of shopping….haggled for a set of 5-6 hairbands…..was very pleased with the deal I got and caught with the gang at the beach….We ate some of the best food in a shack…..awesome French toast, pan cakes….juice….I think breakfast is the best meal of the day…hate lunch, hate dinner love breakfast though it was almost lunch time by the time we had food!!

The guys decided to take to the water again…frolicked…wrote my name on the sand….tasted prawn sandwich(just a bite)….

We then decided to get back to calangute beach….4 guess what?? Parasailing…..

Oh God I had been watching the junta parasailing the other day….it looked so good from far off but when I got near those gigantic things I was shit scared…..I am not afraid of heights…just inclined things make me go hay wire…..But I thought…IF NOT NOW…WHEN??! so 6 of us signed up….me and adi….sangha and hemant…..maddy and sandy…..sangha and hemant made purfffect landing…..and next was my turn……I was shocked when I saw the form I was signing….i paid 500 bucks and signed a form which said I knew swimming perfectly well and could save myself….!!!ya rite…..i cant walk straight let alone swim and save myself…..!! nevertheless…..

We got ourselves strapped and off we went………

…………………………………………………………………………….

I think those moments in air single handedly takes the pride of place amongst my most cherished moments ever……me and adi just shut up….it’s strange….you cant hear a word... you are there……the sun on ur face…..the water below you…..I didn’t close my eyes lest I miss any moment…..and before you know its all over…and your back to the cacophony….but you can never forget that moment when you were with just yourself……up in the air…..

The beauty of physics strikes you when you are done with it…..junta plz do this…itz just awesome….

Headed back to panjim….tanned to the core….sun burnt…..but very happy…..

As usual we promised to do this once every year…in the back of our minds we all knew it might never happen……..

As I sat in the bus….i just thought…Its all over…..my days as a student….all the careless fun filled days….living off parents and brothers money……but this goa trip I let myself loose……my assignments took a back seat….research was forgotten….and I had done a lot of things that I would have never done otherwise….tasted prawns….drank what is remotely alcohol….. ……played in the water like there aint no tomorrow(double negative…..i cant help it….just once!!) got lost and felt happy for as tolkien said “ not all who wander are lost”

i cant take it anymore!

2006-02-21T14:44:00.000+05:30

Just when i was thinking that no one reads my blog.... ppl pop up with comments...hallelujah!!!!thanx guys....!!!

Was kind of flattering to hear junta say nice things abt me(rather my blog...!) so was just thinking what were the nicest compliments i have got in sometime now......

Me was never the kind who felt nice when someone complimented me on my looks(which was one of those rare occassions when i cared to dress nicely) But i would feel on top of the world when some1 said something close to me being intelligent, or easy to talk to etc etc.... so here are my most cherished compliments......

1) When Ashwin calls up asking my opinion on which books he should be buying with his gift vouchers...(thanx ash;)!)

2) When rajesh said i was easy to talk to....in downrite local tamil!!!!

3) When Dinup said talking to me was easy....as easy as talking to a male friend of his....!(thanx D but stop swearing at me when i call)!!!

4) When my 5th std science teacher sanjana tells me I havent changed.....(is that good or bad i wonder)(btw sanju is one of my best friends)!!!!

5)When my classmates pronounced me funny enough to write something on my own for the year book!!!

6) When my roommates made a crown for me reading"queen of brats" for my birthday(Thanx payal arpit lakyn ruby divi and mishra!!)

PS: notice gals never compliment much!!!!! Probably this is what Seinfeld meant when he told Elaine that she was a "Man's woman"!! Still not sure if thatz a compliment or not..!!!!

the happy nut

2006-02-09T10:25:00.000+05:30

Just thought I should pen down my feelings of the past few days. Have you ever been on a water scooter? I think it is an amazing feeling. You are right there in the front. The trainer sits behind you and your partner sits behind him. The trainer holds the steering and brakes very often to scare you. But when you go i think it is just an awesome moment. The vast expanse of the ocean staring at you. Nothing but water for as far as you can see……just plain greenish blue and the sun…..You have nothing to fear….the wind on your face…..exhilarating…..

And for the past few days I have been feeling just the same…. Happy with me as a person….enjoying the last few days of my college life….just plain fun…..

One of my guys remarked” gal you are taking up a job in a few months time…when the hell are you going to change”….well should I?!!! isn’t it nice being like this…

He calls me “nut”….ya thatz what I am – the happy nut….

bc suttah to u all!

2006-02-07T14:00:00.000+05:30

I was listening to this song “ BC Suttah” by a Pakistani band called Zeest. Hmmmmm what should I say. Well I am a person who doesn’t swear. Bloody being the max I get…. I don’t smoke, the max I have got with alcohol with is cranberry breezer and taking occasional sips of drinks from others. Ya..yaya….i know definition of a complete tam gal!!! do I regret it? No…. am I looking forward to changing myself to a cool yo types!!! Definitely not!!! But when I heard this song I just couldn’t help enjoying myself. I just couldn’t get enough of it….the song is all about how a guy gave up smoking first due to parents then next to girlfriend and finally because of marriage. It ends with a liberal sprinking of BC MC!!!! PPL u have to listen to this song….. So when my friend saw me enjoy this song so much…..he just remarked…” Gal, there is a person in you who wants to break free and just swear at every1!!!” I think he just caught a glimpse of me….actually each one of us who just wants to break free from the mundane stuff, just thoroughly soak ourselves in all the arbit stuff in the world, doing just the things that which we enjoy…no HR, no marketing no assignments, just plain life…listen to music, read…..and of course endless campus fun….. I cant help but remember the eagles say…”hate growing up so fast!!!”

that lucky dress

2006-02-07T13:59:00.000+05:30

The stuff in life which is so normal that people have stopped noticing it.
Now now...letz see one issue...-lucky dresses!!!
all U girls out there I am sure there must be atleast a couple of going "OH ya!!!"
well I started thinking about it this morning.Why the thought?! well I had my project presentation.so whatz my fave dress got to do with my project presentation?!well just that I didnt have a clue as to what my project was.So i left my logical side of the brain home and thought " Well if nothing is going to get me past this ppt atleast this dress will!!!" so there i go with favourite salwar.(Ya thatz ite we can wear only salwar to college...but letz consider that issue for another day)!My lucky dress happens to be a green salwar which i bought in my first year of college...Ya Ya it still fits me.I stopped growing long back.The dress is now faded and is crying it's heart out.My mom sees me come downstairs and realises that I am in a do or die situation the do standing for my salwar;)!
So off I go with my dress least bothered about the project.
But how long can i keep my brain from working.So it popps out once in a while and reminds me "Gal this is just a dress...it wont u answer ur questions on Microcontrollers...." i shut it back in and continue with my various useless activities in college.
I enter college expecting to be blasted my project mates..LO! they are late!!!Good going i think to myself.
Just when i think that there arrives Ms.B and Ms.L...they are my project mates and are not exactly my favourite things currently!
So I go about the usual stuff until my project time!!!!
But is theluck running out....lets see...Looks like coz i heard my HOD was the main examiner!!!OOps....My confidence took a nose dive. But i put on my brave face and think "HERE I COME PPL"!
me enters hall:

I see my friend BOO presenting her project wearing her lucky salwar.From the far end my friend VR waves to me wearing her lucky salwar which she claims got her into WIPRO!!!!
I turn to my right to find my batch mate Ms.K wearing her blue salwar which she claims has got her short listed in every damn aptitude test she wrote wearing that!
Now what has my salwar done for me.I can still remember that balmy day.Oh crap...i mean one of those horrible afternoons where I amwaiting outside My dept.Headz room waiting for him to sign my leave letter(I know I am in college:(((()))
So he calls me in and says congrats and I go." what??!"! Guess what I got a prize in the District level essay competition.So he grants me half a day off for the awards function.Hurray!!!!I am back after a 3 day vacation and here he is giving me another day off...Ya thatz rite I was wearing my green salwar for the first time!!!!
Engg.mechanics exams,lab exams, class tests, competitions, the salwar has always been there to save me..
So now back to my project presentation!
Enter Project presentation hall.!!my project ppt gets advanced by almost half an hour,Is my darn luck running out?!
or is the salwar losing it's charm.Letz wait and watch.
Next team on stage "B& co" goes the announcer with my heart thumping!
And as we rise i envisaged a miracle.I saw my HOD rise and leave for his class.Hallelujah!!!!!!!!!!
So we rush through our presentation lest my Hod comes back! and with such great going i was positive that no one was going to question us!and as i turn around to the audience I see a million hands in air...( u know i mean a handful)!
My batchmates cower in fear. Me the braveless picks up the mic and answers the questions...Future advancements in my project---well if someone could tell me what my current project is i would be grateful
what are the disadvantages? ya rite duh!!!
and the best question... my project deals with remote data entry and a person asks me when it is going to be implemented in the urban area...DUHHHHH!!!!!
Anyways my brains thinks overtime(Thanx to my friend hari's useless gyan) I cook up a story abt a gsm chip, a sms and motor control!!!!!!!surprise surprise people are pleased.I passed.I am happy!!!!OOps...Thanx to my lucky dress!!!

every dress has itz bad day and mine was the XAT and CAT this year!!!!!
Whatever!!!!

kanyakumari

2006-02-07T13:56:00.000+05:30

KANYAKUMARI.KANYAKUMARI-The southern most tip of India(technically it is Indira point. in Nicobar islands),from kashmir to kanyakumari.The euphemisms for Kanyakumari are endless.But to me it is simple-The closest thing i ever had to a native place)I really dont remeber my first trip but the one i consider my first is the time when my dad sent me and my brother for a vacation during my cousin Sundar's upanayanam function.I had never been out my house until then on my own.The family at Kanyakumari welcomed us and treated us as their own.It was the first time i was spending time with so many people at a time.We have always been a small family.I dont really have any cousins neither have i been a part of any boisterous giant family.I have never seen my paternal grandparents.So initially it was kind of a rude shock to see so many people but i blended in gardually.Since then kanyakumari has been really special to me.Our house(my grandmother's younger sis's house;)!) is located right on the main road leading to the famous kanyakumari temple.I proudly used to say that we have an ocean at the back of the house.It was a fairly large building.One of the very few houses left unsold on the SANNADHI STREET.My relatives owned a couple of handi crafts shop.My periappa (dad's cousin bro)used to stay in the adjacent house.It was the month of may and the scene almost looks like a stolen scene from one of RK NARAYAN'S fictional place -malgudi. Except that it was flooded with tourists.My cousins arrived one by one.Got acquainted with them slowly.Day began slowly in kanyakumari.It seemed almost in slow motion in the early morning.Getting up late was almost a unsaid rule.My brother the kumbhakarnan of the family would seem rooted to his bed.Breakfast was always sumptous with my auntz and thevu akka(thatz my grand momz sis) churning out one delicacy after the other.This would be only till around 930 when the shops open and the tourists start pouring in.My uncle owned a book shop so we kids used to go and sit there and read up every comic we could lay hands.We gobbled as many books as we could(we cudnt afford archies then...we still cant;)!))Mornings used to be pretty hot.We used to stay indoors and read mostly or just play around aimlessly.My relatives owned a house which was situated on the top floor of the handi crafts shop.Almost always strewn around with books and handi crafts it had a musty smell to it but neverthless seemed very creepy because no one really used it.We played our endless games there.Lunch was a thorough south indian affair with avial kootu there almost everyday!!!!!An afternoon siesta after a bit of reading lead us to the most fun part of the day-the evening.Evenings are interesting and very colorful.With endless tourists ambling in and out of the shops the atmosphere was almost festive.My uncles used to take us (the children) to the beach and there we would all have BEACH BATH.....well it was never really a bath we used to frolick in the beach for hours together.The beach was a very dirty place but we had our fun.Gandhi statue,,,,endless beach kadlai.......it was on our agenda everyday.The salt of the water darkened the complexion of all the kids..The walk back home used to be fun.All of us completely drenched and careless...On reaching home we all rushed to bathrooms to wash the salt off our skin.With just two bathrooms we used to end up with two bathrooms in one bathrooms(oh come on we were kids and we did stupid things)!)The trips to vattakottai and manalkunnu are almost frozen in memory.As the evening wore on the fun never stopped.We used to sit on the doorstep of the shop watching the various people enter and leave....reading our books sometimes.In the night our MURALI CHITAPPA used to tell us scary stories of how families committed suicide and and how the neighbouring hotel was haunted.It was the time when people were not corrupted by soap operas on tv.Dinner was slow and enjoyed by one and all...and we went to bed reading our books.My favourite spot in the whole of kanyakumari is a spot in the terrace under the water tank.I used to climb the wall of the house to and reach there with a book in hand.Once i was there reading"man woman and child" when i fell asleep with the book in hand lulled by the breeze.In the night the spot was almost unblemished.It gave a full view of the ocean.With just the star lit sky above your head and the whole arabian sea indian ocean and bay of bengal ocean in front of you ,you feel humbled.The Vivekananda rock stares at you from one end..and now a thiruvalluvar statue does too.....You cant help but think of Swami Vivekanda who must have swam the very ocean in front of you and must have sat on the very rock that stares at you.The moon plays a game with the waves by shifting in and out of the clouds.And my brother used to tell me tales about his dead classmate and how his spirit haunted his hostel and to think i got scared by all that.I can still remember how my brother explained about the ghost which came and told my brother of all people "vaaaaaaa"( cooommmmeeee with all the sound effects)!!!!It was chilling with all the sea and moon in front of you!!!!But these days i grow very depressed when i go to Kanyakumari.The family u now know is no longer ur own.They are not my grandparents.It is not my house and neither they are my own cousins....I leave there with a longing for a family of my own.Somebody i could call my grandparents.Someone who spoils with me gifts.Never does a trip go by without the mention of my grandparents.How i resemble my grandmother---how my grandfather would speak for hours together on shakespeare....But Kanyakumari still holds it s charm and gave me something close to my childhood memories in my native place.....So the next time you go down to kanyakumari remember that room no 101 in Hotel SAMUDRA is haunted!!!!!!!!!!!!!

onam celebrations

2004-08-21T14:51:00.000+05:30

well onam is coming near....and all the malluz(mallz) have started their prep and in the process they have dragged me also. The only high point of the mall celeb is the food.There is pappadam avial inji curry!!! but the low point(s) i have to drape a mall sari and pretend to be a mall for sometime...so how adept am I at that?

Letz go down memory lane....while at school i was surrounded by mallu nuns and kids...It was christian missionary convent so while i was young i was forced to believe that i was a mall myself esp because i used to wear" chandanam" on my forehead after dadz pooja...

then when i started realising i did not speak mall at home i decided enough is enough and i broke free of the mall cadre;)!

My mom has stayed all her life in kerala...and is a pseudo mall.She lives on mall channles like surya and asianet....and celebrates onam religiously every year,....and enjoys everything that is mallu! while here i am born in coimbatore....knowing mallu becoz i watched mall movies....
and as regards my dad he is from travancore which is more confusing as he was earlier in Kerala and now in Tamilnadu....
and my bro...well thatz an interesting part to talk abt.Born in mallu land thatz his closest association with mallz.... he can say some words like" podi patti....endha sugam thanne alle;)!"

so where does that leave me?? thatz rite nowhere.....here the mallz call me pseudo mall for want of help in celebration....Infact they r outsourcing their celebs;)!

so who r these mallz...there are some mallz who speak worse mallu than i do....
"ninakku kitty oh?"
on the agenda is " KAI KO TTI KA LI" TO be prnounced with an anglicized accent....
saddhi...with pal payasam...

ofcourse the mall set saree which my mum is couriering for me....
and ya then there are some tam brahms who r confused....
srividhya my senior- tam brahm whose mum is from kerala....but they speak marathi at home and she knows neither mall or tam props!!!!tri partite agreement!!!!!

and then there is Ms.X
a tam brahm from chennai who tries as much as possible to spoeak mallu so that she is accepted in the mall crowd!!! reminds me of my classmate annu...(which shall dealt as a separate topic)!

So there i go this september singing " dhithara thaga thai dithai thaga thai thai thom"!!!!!!!!!!!

one day at a time in tiss

2004-08-14T14:05:00.000+05:30

Lush green treees, stone walls, a building out of time but right on the highway! That is TISS for U! and just like the mismatch of location we are the error in the college-PMIR STUDENTS! in a social work school!

My journey to tiss was almost a mistake and i thought so till the end of first week in college when u feel that everything thatz happening to you is wrong... You fall ill,u fall down and hit ur head and every one is new and ya u hate the loos! but then now itz almost my home.... The safe precincts of tiss.....

It almost gets u wondering how you can change so fast.From a spoilt brat to ahem an almost responsible person.But then u also start wondering if u will ever be a part of home again in the very sense of it.

I can still remember how my mom used to wait for me at the doorstep while i walked from the bustop(which was jus opp. to my house)! Incase she was missing i would go really mad.Now u have no one to welcome U.Just blank dull walls and ur dirty table....
No one to give u mango juice but jus watery tea in Dining Hall(DH).

But the truth lies in the fact u no longer think of it as a mistake. i have actually stopped cribbing and started enjoying my work.I am amazed at the fact that I have actually started doing my own assignments.All my life in engg there has not been one assignment which i wrote on my own! Things change and u change along with it...who started the change....thatz like who came first the egg or the chicken!

But itz almost like a hallucination for me.I am here watching my life go by and i wonder what I am going to be doing the next part.What more changes are going to take place.Itz almost like and end of a chapter.Itz dream like to see your friends move on with their life.You know itz true but you still have not come to terms with it.

after all I AM JUST A DREAMER..... I DREAM MY LIFE

You may say Im a dreamer,
but Im not the only one,